


Dust to Dust

by dinosaursmate



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: (1D minus Harry), Angst, Conspiracy Theories, Enemies to Lovers, Harry's a Big Louie, Hate to Love, Impersonation, M/M, Mention of a Car Accident, Mentions of Death, No Smut, OT4, Paul Is Dead AU, Recreational Drug Use, Smoking, Tumblr, but implied blow job, kind of, musician Ed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-17
Updated: 2017-08-17
Packaged: 2018-12-12 20:56:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 23,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11745033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dinosaursmate/pseuds/dinosaursmate
Summary: “There’s no way it’s true.” Harry shrugged, letting out a small laugh. “Louis can’t be… dead.”Dead. The force of the word hit Harry like a ton of bricks. There were actually rumours that his Louis was dead. His heart rate picked up. It wasn’t true. No way.---Harry, an active participant in the One Direction Tumblr fandom, comes across a rumour that Louis died and has been replaced with a lookalike.





	Dust to Dust

**Author's Note:**

  * For [lululawrence](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lululawrence/gifts), [its_serendipity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/its_serendipity/gifts).



> Based on [the conspiracy theory](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_is_dead) that Paul McCartney died in 1966 and was replaced with a lookalike. 
> 
> This obviously has a lot of references to Louis being dead and being in a car crash so proceed with caution if you have difficulty with that kind of thing. Remember, you can always contact me if you need more info.
> 
> This also attributes a strange mash of 1D & Harry songs as One Direction's new album. Give me a bit of artistic license with that. Haha.
> 
> Thank you to [Molly](http://becomeawendybird.tumblr.com/) and [Keri](http://icanhazzalou.tumblr.com/) for the betaing!
> 
> I got the idea for this fic and Sus got so excited about it that she asked me to write it for her birthday. How can I say no to Sus? So I wrote it for [Steph!](http://lululawrence.tumblr.com/>Sus</a>%20and%20also%20<a%20href=)

When Harry Styles came face to face with…  _ that man,  _ his heart was in his mouth. Those blue eyes, arms littered with tattoos, that carefully styled fringe.

It was all such  _ utter bullshit.  _

The man who called himself Louis was walking towards him, smiling politely and holding his hand out. Harry just stared at him, rolling his eyes as ‘Louis’ stared at him expectantly.

“Okay…” ‘Louis’ said after a couple of seconds, looking at his manager helplessly.

“Should we… sit down?” she suggested, and reluctantly, Harry obeyed. He fixed ‘Louis’ with a hard stare. This was going to be interesting.

-

**Some time ago**

“Fuck off.” Ed hummed softly to himself, strumming a few notes on his guitar. “Fuck  _ off.” _

Harry giggled, crooking his toes on Ed’s forearm yet again. Ed turned to him with a dark, deadly stare which he knew was the only thing that could get Harry to stop. Harry withdrew his foot, sighing.

“I’m  _ bored,  _ Ed.” Harry pouted at Ed who pointedly ignored him. “Where’s James?”

“Probably avoiding you,” Ed muttered.

“Hey,” Harry complained. He groaned, frustrated, and climbed to his feet to make a cup of tea, just for something to do. 

As he listened to the low rumble of the kettle, he pulled his phone out and absently scrolled Tumblr. He sighed. Nothing was going on, so he threw his phone down on the counter and pulled a cup from the cupboard. 

“I’m not making you a cup of tea!” Harry called out to Ed. No response. “Moody bastard.”

Harry threw a tea bag into his cup and poured the boiling water over it. He dropped a spoon into the cup, stirring it slowly as he stared out of the window. It was a rainy Saturday afternoon and Harry had planned to relax, but he’d never really done well with that kind of thing. He had a lot of washing to do but there wasn’t much point if it was raining. 

Ed started to play guitar with more gusto, singing loudly. Harry rolled his eyes as he squeezed his tea bag against the side of his cup and chucked it into the bin. It was wonderful that Ed was talented and doing so well, and all that. But fuck, he was annoying when he was playing in the bloody communal rooms of the flat.

Harry splashed some milk into his tea, stirring it one last time before dropping the spoon into the sink with a clatter. He decided to head into his room, close the door and watch a film. Or at least something he could turn up loud enough to block out Ed’s incessant singing. 

He made it out of the kitchen, turning to glare at Ed just as the front door opened and James appeared. He looked… harassed. He was dripping wet from the rain despite his bright yellow umbrella hanging loosely from his hand. He looked at Harry with wide eyes.

“Alright, Cordo?” Harry asked tentatively.

“Have you been on Tumblr?” James threw the umbrella in the corner by the door and disappeared into Harry’s room without another word. Harry scurried after him, trying not to spill his tea. 

“I was on, like, five minutes ago.”

“Where’s your laptop?” James kicked his trainers off and sat down on Harry’s bed. 

“James, what’s going on?”

“One Direction released a new song!”

Harry’s eyes widened comically. “Have you listened to it?”

“No! I waited for you!”

Harry handed James his laptop and watched as he quickly opened it. He headed onto Harry’s Tumblr and scrolled for a few seconds before looking at Harry pointedly.

“Ready?” James asked. “It’s not up on iTunes over here yet, so we have to listen to it on Tumblr. This post will probably be deleted in a few minutes.”

“Alright, alright. Play it.”

James played the song and Harry listened with rapt attention. He liked it. It was a great pop song and he had a feeling One Direction had a hit on their hands.

“Wow!” James said. “It’s great.”

“It’s so good. Is it called Drag Me Down?”

“Yup.” James closed Harry’s laptop and placed it on the bed. “I reckon the video won’t be far behind.”

“Oh my God,” Harry said, sighing. “I can’t wait for the video. I miss Louis’ face.”

James rolled his eyes fondly as he stood up to leave the room, leaving a huge wet patch on Harry’s bed and dripping his way out into the hallway.

-

The video had been released and Harry was watching it for the ninth time. The boys all looked great but Louis looked wonderful. There was something different about him. The band had taken a short break between albums, so Louis had been under the radar for awhile and Harry had missed him. He looked lighter, less tired than he had before. Harry’s mouth cocked into a smile.

“When did you say the album was coming out?”

“In two weeks,” James replied to Ed. “I can’t wait, man.”

“How come you didn’t know about this?” Harry asked Ed. “With all your connections, you should’ve known.”

“I don’t go around asking everybody in the music industry about One Direction.”

“You should,” James offered. “See if you can find anything out, so I can put it on my Tumblr.”

“No!”

“Guys,” Harry interrupted. “Stop. Hey, let’s have a little listening party when the album comes out, yeah?”

James and Ed agreed and Harry began to plan what he’d bake for the occasion. One Direction cupcakes? Maybe some other kind of themed dessert. Either way, he was very excited.

-

Harry and James both spent a lot of time on Tumblr blogging about One Direction, but Ed was a far more casual fan. Harry was one of a group of fans who was convinced Louis was gay. James was inclined to agree, and Ed didn’t care either way (though he often teased Harry, saying it was wishful thinking on his part). Harry didn’t talk about it too much on his blog, although he didn’t make it a secret. He got a bit of hate for it sometimes but honestly, he didn’t understand how anyone couldn’t see it. 

As they sat watching TV, Harry and James both got Twitter notifications at the same time. It was Zayn, posting a photo of him and Louis hanging out at the studio. Harry’s heart panged. Louis looked gorgeous, as usual. Zayn was very close with Louis, and Harry had always been a little bit jealous, which was obviously ridiculous. Still, it wasn’t as if Harry would ever get the chance to meet Louis, anyway.

“Zayn is gorgeous, isn’t he?” James remarked, sighing as he stared at his phone. “Don’t you think, Harry? I mean, obviously he’s always good looking, but in this photo-”

“Yes, fine.” Harry scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Zayn is beautiful. But Louis is just…”

James smiled fondly. Harry was probably Louis’ biggest fan, and everybody knew it. 

“Alright, fuckers?” Ed came into the living room, clutching his guitar. “I just posted a cover of Drag Me Down.”

“Did you now?” Harry replied.

“Are neither of you subscribed to my YouTube channel? You idiots suck. Go and post it on Tumblr.”

“No offense, Ed. But I will never listen to you singing by choice.” James raised his eyebrows. “In fact, if I never hear you sing ever again, it’ll be too soon.”

“Dickhead,” Ed mumbled and James smirked at Harry. “You both be sorry when I’m playing Wembley Stadium and I don’t invite you.”

“Wembley Stadium?” Harry smiled, patronising. “Keep dreaming big, darling.”

James giggled childishly and Ed looked like he wanted to hit Harry over the head with his guitar. Ed got teased the most in the flat because he could take the heat a bit better than the other two. Harry absolutely couldn’t take being teased, and so the boys left him alone most of the time.

Harry dutifully opened Ed’s video on his YouTube app and watched. It was classic Ed: acoustic, spritely, almost aggressive. It was fantastic, of course.

“Well?” Ed asked once it had finished.

“Flawed.”

-

It was a Thursday night, and Harry was baking cupcakes. He decided on light, sweet lemon cupcakes, because something about them reminded Harry of Louis. One Direction’s album would come out in three hours, at midnight, and in the meantime James was hanging around in the kitchen, watching Harry work.

“I can’t believe Ed isn’t home yet,” James said as he tapped away at his phone. “If he doesn’t turn up I’m going to replace his toothpaste with pile cream.”

Harry turned around to pull a disgusted face. He scraped the side of his mixing bowl with a spatula, folding the batter together to make sure everything was fully integrated. James was supposed to be watching him as a form of learning, but he kept getting distracted by absently scrolling Tumblr and answering anons. 

“I don’t get why people always think I’m gay.”

Harry rolled his eyes. “You can’t blame people for not thinking you’re straight.”

“But-”

“Last week you recced a fic that was just ten thousand words of smut.”

“I only read it because I was curious,” James mumbled.

“Yes, well. I didn’t appreciate you sending me quotes from it. Liam and Louis fucking is not something I’d ever like to imagine.”

James hummed under his breath as Harry used an ice cream scoop to measure batter into muffin cases. He was halfway through when James stopped scrolling, looking up at Harry curiously.

“Um - Harry? What’s this about an article coming out about Louis dying in a car crash?”

“Mm,” Harry hummed, sucking cake batter from his thumb and rolling his eyes. “It was like, the middle of the night and it was up for about three minutes before it was pulled. How did you not know?”

“I don’t know!”

“Hm,” Harry contemplated. “Oh, I think it was when you were in Tenerife with Julia.”

“Oh! So, recently?”

“Yeah, yeah. It was like, two or three weeks back?” Harry shrugged.

“I can’t believe you never told me!”

“Yeah, because it was so dumb. It was 3 or 4am, and it said that Louis had been in this terrible car crash and had been pronounced dead. It was horrific on Tumblr for, like, six hours. I was out of my mind with worry and terror. But it was some random site and they pulled it down immediately. The next day, Louis casually posts a selfie on Instagram. See, people say the boys don’t know what goes on in the fandom, but Louis did it to reassure us.”

“He’s so good.” James sighed dreamily. “I wonder what on earth possessed someone to write an article like that.”

“I wonder if it was someone going rogue. I mean, don’t drag Louis into it, though. I was worried sick, I was crying and everything. Ed wasn’t home so I was freaking out all on my own.”

He threw the muffin tray into the oven and sighed.

“Right, I need a cup of tea.”

The cupcakes turned out beautifully, and if Harry was honest, he expected nothing less from himself. Ed came home at 10.45pm and the boys set themselves up with snacks and soft drinks and alcohol. Songs from the album had been leaking throughout the day but all three boys refused to listen until it was officially released and they could listen together.

The boys were silent as they started to listen. Harry was actually nervous, but good song followed good song and he relaxed. A very Louis-centric song called No Control - it seemed to be about morning wood which was  _ very _ interesting to Harry - was a clear favourite for him and James smirked at him as it finished. When the album ended Ed exhaled with a huff, looking first at Harry, and then James.

“It’s a fucking good album, lads,” Ed said with a grin.

“It’s  _ so _ good!” James gushed. “Two Ghosts is amazing.”

“That was my favourite, too,” Ed agreed.

Harry picked up a cupcake and took a bite, his mind a glorious muddle of a dozen songs. He was a very proud fan tonight. He and James were always going to like the album but Ed was a tougher customer. 

“This is gonna be huge,” Harry said ecstatically. “Their biggest album yet!”

-

James and Harry drove Ed mad, playing the album constantly around the house. Harry couldn’t get enough of it. He spent more time than usual on Tumblr, reading lyric analysis post after lyric analysis post. He answered a few anons asking him his favourite songs and his favourite lyrics and his favourite vocals. He was just about to close his laptop to make some lunch when another anon came in and caught his eye.

**_Anonymous asked:_ ** _ Hi Harry, have you noticed Louis looks a bit different? Sounds a bit different too???  _

Harry chewed on the inside of his cheek. Yeah, he had. But what point was the anon trying to make? That Louis had changed a lot during their little break? Harry went to close his laptop again, but he decided to make a tag post in response.

_ x _  
_ #louis anon #yeah i guess so? #why? do you have a theory? #hmm _

He finally succeeded in closing his laptop and headed into the kitchen. Ed was sitting on the counter, strumming his guitar.

“Do you have to make your crappy music on my kitchen counter?”

“Fuck off.”

In reality, Harry and James were Ed’s biggest fans. In their opinion, it was a complete travesty that Ed wasn’t world famous. He was extraordinarily talented, the songs he wrote masterpiece after masterpiece. They never told Ed, of course. Only on special occasions. Didn’t want him getting a big head, or anything.

Harry heard the front door slam, and James came into the kitchen. James was a milkman and worked early mornings, always coming in at lunchtime, done for the day. 

“Hey, guys. Harry, what did that anon say?”

Harry turned from where he was buttering bread. “Oh. They just asked if I’d noticed Louis looked and sounded different.”

“Odd.”

“Yeah,” Harry replied with a shrug. “I’m not sure what they’re getting at.”

James raised an eyebrow suspiciously. “I’d better check my inbox. I haven’t checked it in days.”

“You really shouldn’t leave it like that,” Harry said.

“Oh, fucking hell!” Ed sighed. “You two and your bloody Tumblr.”

Harry cut his sandwich into triangles as he glared at Ed, before following James into the living room.

“Louis sounds… clearer, I suppose?” James mused, scrolling his phone. “Oh! I got one too.”

“What does it say?!”

_ “‘Something weird is going on with Louis.’  _ That’s strange.”

“Is that all it says?” Harry asked.

James turned to show Harry his phone. The hair prickled at the back of Harry’s neck. Something felt odd about this. 

“Did you see anything else on your dash?” Harry asked James. “Did anyone else get one?”

“I didn’t see anything. You might’ve been the first to get one, since you’re a big Louie-”

“Don’t call me that!” 

“Sorry!” James said before smirking. “But it’s true. Anyway, what do you think it’s about?”

“No clue,” Harry said, frowning.

-

Over the course of the next couple of days, a few more people got similar asks. Some people published them, some people didn’t. 

Harry was up late reading fic, and once he’d finished he somehow ended up balls deep in smutty gay gif blogs. It was 4am, and he swore to himself he’d just scroll this blog for a bit and he’d go to sleep. He was sort of half hard but too tired to do anything about it. Or was he? He stared at a particularly arousing gif for a few seconds before-

“Harry!” 

James burst through Harry’s bedroom door, and Harry’s eyes widened as he casually closed his Tumblr tab, adjusting his duvet to make sure his semi was hidden. Christ. He really should start locking his door.

“What do you want, James?”

“I’m so glad you’re up. I was just getting ready for work, scrolling Tumblr, when-”

James handed Harry his phone. It was open to the blog of one of James’ friends, Eva. Harry raised his eyebrows, reading the tag post.

_ x _

_ #wtf anon #are you sick in the head? #why would you send me a message like that #if i wasn’t on mobile I’d block you #don’t put shit like that out into the universe _

“What the fuck is that about?”

“Wait, she sent me a screenshot.” James sighed heavily, taking his phone back and prodding the screen a few times. He handed his phone back to Harry, watching him closely. Harry squinted at the screenshot.

_ Anonymous asked _

_ Louis is dead. He died in that car crash. Remember it? You’re seeing an imposter. This sounds crazy but you have to believe me. _

Harry’s heart fell out his arse as he slowly looked at James, who looked stressed but Harry couldn’t tell what he was thinking. Harry didn’t know what to think, either.

“Okay,” he said slowly as he handed James’ phone back. “What does Eva think?”

“She just thinks it’s a troll.”

“And you don’t think that.” Harry stated it rather than asked. He could tell in James’ tone.

“I didn’t say that,” James countered. “Just… he  _ has _ seemed different, right?”

“Oh, come on.” Harry frowned, shaking his head. “He doesn’t look  _ that _ different, James.”

“Hm.”

Harry sighed, absently tapping at his chin with his fingertips. “I was starting to think the ‘Louis is different’ anons were some kind of ‘new Louis’ push. But this puts a different spin on things entirely.”

“Could’ve been a seeding for a new rumour.” James nodded. “But Louis? Being dead? What a fucking rumour to start. For what? Promo?”

Harry sighed again. “I don’t know.”

“Look, man. I need to get to work. You working today?”

Harry scoffed. He hadn’t even been to sleep yet. “Yeah. Evening shift.”

“Okay.” James kissed the top of Harry’s head. “Gotta go. I’ll see you when I get home.”

Harry put his laptop on the floor and shuffled down into bed. He thought about the whole thing for a few minutes before sleep overtook him, raunchy gifs swimming round his tired brain as he drifted off.

-

Sitting at the kitchen table, Harry watched one of One Direction’s recent interviews. He watched Louis closely. It  _ couldn’t _ be true. Surely. But something about Louis was off. Different.

James came in from work, silently pulled up a chair and sat down next to Harry.

“It can’t be true,” Harry murmured.

James gave a quiet sigh, watching the screen of Harry’s laptop. Louis was laughing at something Zayn had said and nudging Liam annoyingly.

“I’ve been thinking about this all day,” James said quietly.

“There’s no way it’s true.” Harry shrugged, letting out a small laugh. “Louis can’t be… dead.”

Dead. The force of the word hit Harry like a ton of bricks. There were actually rumours that  _ his _ Louis was  _ dead.  _ His heart rate picked up. It wasn’t true. No way.

“This is bullshit.” Harry slammed his laptop closed. 

By the time he and James had had their lunch, the rumour had started to circulate on Tumblr. A few people had received the same anon as Eva, and some people addressed it with concern and some people addressed it with rampant anger. No blogs seemed to believe it, but the anons had started their hand-wringing. Harry was too scared to even check his own inbox.

“Let’s think about this logically,” James said as they moved into the living room, Harry abandoning his laptop. “Could this be true?”

“You’d be skinned alive on Tumblr if you admitted you were considering this.”

“I’m just trying to look at it from all angles. Isn’t that what you’re always telling people to do?”

“I suppose,” Harry mumbled. “But… dead? And replaced with an imposter?”

“Okay, look. Is this something that is possible, at all?” James pouted, thinking. “If you threw enough money at it, I reckon you could. If you found someone who looked like Louis, gave them enough media training, maybe a bit of plastic surgery… I think it’s possible.”

“Okay, fine. But it doesn’t mean it’s happened.”

“I know. Now, motive.”

“Okay, well. Imagine One Direction without Louis?” Harry sighed, folding his arms. “I’m with you on that one. They absolutely would have reason to replace him as if nothing happened. The band would probably split up if Louis wasn’t around.”

“Right.”

“But that doesn’t make any sense,” Harry said, frowning and propping his chin on his palm. “Because if it wasn’t the real Louis, the boys would still be in bits. The real Louis wouldn’t be there to hold them all together. And the talent wouldn’t be there.”

“But you know the kind of shit that’s in those contracts they sign. Maybe the other boys have no choice but to play along. They’ve probably threatened them with all sorts!”

Harry scratched his scalp erratically, stressed. “You’re scaring me. You’re starting to sound like you believe this.”

“I’m just- Harry!” James whined. “All I’m saying is that logically, they could do it. If Louis died and it was an inconvenience…”

“I just refuse to believe it, okay?” Harry stood up, shrugging exaggeratedly. “He’s not dead!”

He stormed out the room, already feeling guilty for throwing a strop at James. It wasn’t James’ fault. But the whole thing was so unbelievable and on top of that, Harry didn’t even want to consider the horrific possibility that Louis was dead, passed away at the hands of a car accident. He locked himself in the bathroom, running a bath to have a soak and try and forget about this horrible, ridiculous rumour.

-

It was Harry’s desire to work in the music industry but he wasn’t doing so well in that endeavour, considering he worked in the local McDonald’s. As he prepared order after order during the lunchtime rush, he ruminated over the previous day’s conversation with James. The rumour was obviously untrue, but it seemed to be sending shockwaves through Tumblr. Harry still hadn’t been on at all. He couldn’t be bothered with all the discourse.

His break finally came, so he grabbed himself a lunch of nine nuggets and a Coke. He headed into the staff room and read a text from James.

**_James:_ ** _ There are people starting to believe it _

Harry rolled his eyes. 

**_Harry:_ ** _ Why?? Are you serious _

**_James:_ ** _ That Claire girl got an anon saying there’s clues in the new album _

“What the fuck?” Harry murmured. Sighing, he threw a nugget into his mouth and chewed as his phone vibrated.

**_Eddo:_ ** _ Bring home toilet roll you dick _

Harry scoffed. He pressed  _ call _ on James’ number.

_ “Hiya, mate.” _

“James, what’s this all about? Please, I don’t wanna go on Tumblr. Just tell me.”

_ “People are saying the boys have left clues in the lyrics of the album. I dunno, man. It sounds so crazy but some of the stuff…” _

“Well…” Harry sighed, rubbing his forehead. “Look, let’s talk about this when I get home. Okay?”

_ “I’m freaked out, Harry. What if it’s true?” _

Harry’s heart gave a pang of panic. “Let’s chat later. Let's not get all worked up.”

-

“You’ve lost the fuckin’ plot.” Ed rolled his eyes, shaking his head at James. “You really think Louis  _ died  _ and was replaced? Get a grip, mate.”

“You need to pull your head out your arse!” James shot back. “If you want to be in the music industry,  _ mate,  _ you need to realise this is the kind of shit that goes on! It’s not a bloody walk in the park, it’s a shady fucking business, Ed!”

Harry sat on the kitchen counter, biting his thumbnail and listening to One Direction’s latest album through one earphone. James pretty much believed by now that Louis was dead, and when he’d told Ed about the theory, he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“Harry, please don’t tell me you believe all this bollocks?”

If he was honest, he… well, he just didn’t know. It  _ did  _ seem crazy, but the more he thought about it, the less ridiculous it seemed. And now that it had been pointed out to him, there were some lyrics that made him a bit suspicious.

“Leave him alone,” was Harry’s response to Ed. 

“You two need to get off Tumblr and go out into the real world.” And with that, Ed headed to his room, slamming the door.

“Why does he care so much?” Harry frowned, before snorting. “Maybe he’s part of the conspiracy.”

James pouted sadly. “I guess that’s what this is, isn’t it? A conspiracy theory.”

“I’m still not convinced,” Harry said warily. “But I’m not convinced it’s all crap, either. I don’t know. It just seems so implausible, but I said from the moment they came off their little break that there was something off with Louis.”

“You’d know better than any of us, I think. What’s your gut telling you, Harry?”

Harry sighed, frustrated. “It’s telling me that something isn’t right with Louis and I’m really scared.”

James grimaced, pained and sympathetic. Harry wasn’t going to go into full-on panic mode, not just yet. It was still likely it was all a hoax, a prank brought on by bored anonymous trolls. But if it wasn’t? Harry didn’t know how he’d cope.

-

“Good crowd,” James murmured. Harry was slumped in his chair, sipping on his glass of red wine and not feeling in the mood at all. Still, he always tried to be a good friend to Ed. “Hey, those girls are here again.”

Harry sat up straight and glanced down from their place at the balcony to the front of the crowd below. Standing right in front of the stage was a small gaggle of blonde girls who they’d seen at a few of Ed’s gigs recently.

“That’s sweet. He’s got a little fanbase. Cool.” Harry found it a bit weird, the concept of his best mate having  _ fans. _ Still, Ed was an incredible musician and it was just dumb bad luck that he hadn’t hit the big time yet.

The lights dimmed and Ed came out on stage. He worked his magic with his loop pedal and his stupid teeny tiny guitar, and Harry’s heart swelled with pride as he and James applauded and cheered and whooped at the end of his set. They fought their way through the crowd to head backstage, and when they found Ed they tackled him with headlocks and hair ruffles and kisses.

“You were incredible!” Harry said, dishing out the praise he saved only for Ed’s gigs. “You fucking smashed it, man.”

Ed was grinning stupidly, his face covered with sweat that was now all over James and Harry, too. The three of them all piled into Ed’s Mini and he drove them home, Harry entrusted with making sure the little guitar survived the journey. As much as Harry hadn’t been feeling it at the beginning of the evening, getting out and watching one of Ed’s gigs was exactly what he’d needed. The red wine had taken the edge off his recent anxious mood and spending time with his friends helped him forget about the rumours that were bothering him so much.

“To Ed!” James cried, holding up a mug of vodka once they were home, the three of them standing in the middle of the kitchen. 

“To Ed!” Harry repeated, his own mug of vodka clinking against James and Ed’s. He threw the shot back, wincing. “Mate, is this vodka or paint thinner?”

“I reckon he bought it in Poundland,” Ed commented.

“Excuse me, it’s from Sainsbury’s.” James held up the bottle. Although he tried to hide it, Harry could see the plain orange and white label.

“Sainsbury’s Basics? Cordo, why?” Harry whined. “I get that you like to be frugal, love, but some things you just don’t scrimp on.”

“It’s not  _ that _ bad,” James argued weakly.

The three of them got pissed on the cheap vodka, later heading outside to lay on the floor of the balcony, passing round a spliff. There wasn’t really space for the three of them, so Harry put his head under the little patio table and draped his legs over Ed’s.

“Jamie?” Harry asked. “Can I ask you something?”

“Don’t call me Jamie. Why do you always call me Jamie when you’re high?”

“It’s a term of endearment!” Harry scoffed. 

“Well, ask away.”

Harry frowned, biting his bottom lip and sighing quietly. “What am I gonna do if Louis  _ is _ dead?”

“I dunno, H. We’ll take it one day at a time.” James reached out to comfort Harry by touching him wherever he could reach, which happened to be the left side of Harry’s chest. He rubbed a reassuring hand over Harry’s nipple and Harry gave a shiver. “It’s gonna be okay.”

“But, listen!” Ed slurred. “Louis is so wicked, yeah? He’s amazing, yeah, so, um, yeah, if he’s dead, he’s two hundred percent in a better place. Innit?”

“Yeah,” Harry mumbled.

“He’s definitely not dead though, man.” Ed laboriously sat up slightly, slapping Harry on the thigh. “I’m gonna prove it to you! We’ll find the truth, my friend.”

“Thanks, Eddo.”

-

A sharp, stabbing hangover hindered Harry and not even sneaking a second McDonald’s dinner did him any good. He was glad to be working the evening, missing the Saturday lunchtime rush, but as the evening broke the dinnertime crowd started descending on him and he felt too shit to deal with it.

He was unbelievably relieved to see James stroll in just before 9pm.

“James!” he cried out. “Hiya! You here for dinner? What ya after? Big Mac?”

James pouted. “You know I can’t eat this stuff anymore. Julia doesn’t like it.”

“She ain’t the one eating it.”

“She can smell it on my conscience.” James sighed. “She wants me to do this half marathon thing with her in a couple of months. I’ll die, Harry!”

Harry shrugged helplessly as he rounded the counter to go and wipe down some tables.

“Well, the things we do for love. You should bring her round more often, you know.”

“She says the flat smells too much like boy.”

“Outrageous!” Harry squawked. “Well, I suppose you’ll move in with her at some point. Yeah?”

“You trying to get rid of me?” James asked.

“Definitely not. I don’t want you to leave me all alone to listen to Ed’s awful songs day in, day out.”

In reality, Ed was in the middle of writing this one really incredible song at the moment and Harry was a little bit obsessed with it. He wanted to buy it even though it wasn’t finished and every time Ed would sing it in his room, Harry found himself standing outside Ed’s closed door, eavesdropping.

Harry managed to convince James to eat a cheeky bag of four Chicken McNuggets and sent him on his way, promising to see him in a couple of hours when he returned home after his shift. Once they locked the doors and Harry got to mopping the floor, he realised that his hangover and being busy at work meant he hadn’t been hand-wringing over Louis. 

When he arrived home, Ed was out and it sounded like James was taking a bath. James sometimes took hours in the bath, and so Harry made himself a cup of tea before grabbing his laptop from the coffee table to log on to Tumblr and see if anything was going on.

Niall had posted a video of the boys backstage for some festival type gig they were doing over in America. Niall was laughing as Zayn was balancing as many forks on Liam’s face as he could. Louis was in the background, tapping away at his phone and occasionally looking over at Zayn and grinning softly. 

Once upon a time, Louis would be in the throes of the action, loud and larger than life. Instead, he seemed withdrawn and distracted. Harry frowned and as the forks all fell from Liam’s face and made a loud clattering sound, Louis just raised his eyebrows in surprise and shook his head with a small grin.

It was like a punch in the gut. There was no doubt about it, in Harry’s mind. Louis was different. This wasn’t his Louis. Tears pricked his eyes as he heard James come out of the bathroom, humming quietly to himself as he made his way to his room. Harry grabbed his laptop and trotted down the hall after James.

He knocked on the door, waiting for a second before pushing the door open with no invitation.

“Jesus!” James yelped, naked and quickly covering his private parts with his hands. Harry frowned, looking James up and down before sitting on his bed.

“Put some clothes on, James. We need to talk about this Louis thing.”

James huffed, shuffling around as Harry opened his laptop and looked at it, pointedly ignoring James’ nude form behind him.

“Did something happen?” James asked, sitting on the bed next to Harry, suddenly fully clothed.

“No. Well…” Harry sighed. “Niall posted this video, and I was watching Louis in it. He’s so different, James.”

James just nodded sadly, watching as Harry played the video to him. Harry chewed his lip nervously, feeling sadder and sadder as he watched the video again. 

“Weird, isn’t it?” James said quietly.

“Really weird.”

-

Ed found himself with an agent not long after the gig and Harry and James were over the moon for him. Ed might finally start getting bigger gigs, and Harry reckoned this was the start of something huge. Harry tried not to dwell on his own employment situation as he took his uniform out of the washing machine, watching Ed strum on his guitar.

“What song should I record as my demo, do you think?”

Harry pouted, thinking. “Dunno. Thinking Out Loud?”

“Hmm.” Ed scrunched his nose. “I was thinking something a bit more… upbeat? Unique. I’m not sure it’ll help me to stand out.”

“What about that Nando’s song you wrote?”

“Fuck off.” Ed leaned on his guitar, watching Harry put his damp uniform on the radiator. “Harry, do you really think all that stuff about Louis is true? Do you really believe it?”

“I think so,” Harry said with a sigh. He shrugged at Ed. “I know you think it’s crap.”

“I just don’t want you getting yourself upset unnecessarily.”

“That’s very sweet of you, Ed.” Harry sat down at the table and pulled his phone out. “But I can look after myself.”

He scrolled Tumblr, stopping at posts about Louis and the death rumour.  _ Call me crazy,  _ one blogger wrote,  _ but I definitely think they’re giving clues. Look at Louis’ selfie and work it out. _

_ I’m blocking anyone who believes this fucking conspiracy, _ another wrote. Harry scoffed, blocking them before they inevitably blocked him. 

He kept scrolling and he came across Louis’ selfie. He was looking directly into the camera, hair soft, eyes glistening. He was wearing a t-shirt with a big skull on and Harry’s heart jumped. The skull was likely what some perceived as a clue.

_ It’s not just the skull,  _ the next post read,  _ the red lighting makes it a bit sinister, no? His eyes look like they have tears in them.  _

Harry quickly dropped his phone to the table, sighing. It was all too much to deal with. He’d been reading about people’s interpretations of the lyrics, and it just fucked with his head. Two Ghosts was an obvious one, what with it blatantly being about being a shadow of your former self. Love You Goodbye seemed to some like a final sendoff. The mere title of Illusion made the conspiracy theorists scoff with indignation.

Harry was starting to think of those conspiracy theorists as  _ us _ rather than  _ them.  _ He knew James believed the rumour, too. He sighed, picking his phone up again and creating a new post.

_ For the record, I definitely believe something is up with Louis and I’m kind of wondering if there’s truth to all this. _

He pressed post and waited for the onslaught of anons in his inbox. 

-

Harry spent his day off on Tumblr, answering anons. He closed his inbox a few hours in, not being able to keep up. James arrived home from work and sat down to watch Harry.

“People will believe this just because you do, you know.”

“Don’t say that,” Harry whined. “I don’t want that kind of pressure.”

“Sorry, but it’s true.” James shrugged. “You know it is. But if this whole thing is real, the more people that are speaking about it, the better.”

“I suppose.”

“Expose them!” James cried. “If Louis really is dead and they’re covering it up, that needs to be exposed.”

“Alright. Calm down, love.” Harry sighed. “This is mad.”

“Louis deserves better.”

Harry looked at James and nodded. “You’re right. He does.”

-

Ever since Harry had started working at McDonald’s, he tried to go for a run every day. As well as keeping his weight in check, it was great for his mood and provided him some valuable alone time to think.

He’d turned his thoughts to Niall, Liam, and Zayn. They obviously were going along with the whole charade, but it was likely they didn’t have any choice. His heart went out to them. Not only had they lost a best friend, but they weren’t allowed to publicly grieve. They had to take this imposter under their wing and pretend he was Louis.

It was disgusting.

When Harry got home, he was sweating and exhausted. He’d pushed himself a bit too far this morning, like he tended to when he was stressed, and he flopped down onto the sofa before remembering he meant to fetch himself a cold bottle of water from the fridge. He groaned loudly, forcing himself to his feet and walking into the kitchen. Ed was frying bacon.

“Ugh, why?” Harry whined. “I just went for a run.”

“Good job there’s none for you, then.”

Harry stared mournfully at the bacon as he grabbed his bottle of water and a banana. He left the kitchen and went into his bedroom to put as much distance between himself and the bacon as possible. He checked his phone and there was a text from James.

**_James:_ ** _ An article has come out! _

Harry hummed to himself, opening Tumblr as he chomped his banana. Some teen site had written an article about the conspiracy, being fairly dismissive of the idea and saying the fans were crazy. Harry wasn’t surprised. The media liked to pretend the fans were all silly young girls who didn’t know what they were on about, ever.

Still, Harry was interested that it was being picked up by the media. If it spread further, One Direction’s team would likely respond. Harry would love to know what they’d say.

When James came home a couple of hours later, Harry was still in his room and James came in, frowning.

“What the fuck are you listening to?”

“I’m listening to the new songs backwards to see if I can find any clues.”

James looked at him like he had lost the plot. “Alright.”

“Look,” Harry said with a frustrated sigh. “Hiding subliminal messages in songs is a classic tactic. There’s a whole Wikipedia page dedicated to backmasked messages in songs.”

“But that’s a different thing, right? Isn’t that when messages are backwards when the song plays forwards? And they’re not hidden?”

“Same thing, James,” Harry said with a roll of his eyes. “Except the not hidden part. Look, people have been doing this since music began. If they’re trying to send us messages, this is exactly where they’re gonna put something. It’s just as likely as telling us through lyrics.”

“This is getting creepy,” James complained. “I don’t like it.”

“None of us like it.” Harry hit the space bar on his laptop to pause the music. “This whole thing is horrible. I’m not letting it go.”

“What are you gonna do?”

“Not be quiet, for one thing.”

-

Harry started to record videos to post on Tumblr. He found it easier to get through his inbox that way, answering questions and expressing his opinions. He’d started to be more vocal about the whole thing and people had begun to flock to him to get answers and to chat about the conspiracy.

“I understand if some of you don’t wanna believe it, I get that. It’s just… as a Louie, I can’t help but notice the change in him. It’s not the same person. It’s not.” Harry shrugged into the camera. “I kind of think we need to do something, I just don’t know what. But I don’t plan on shutting up any time soon.”

Harry’s follower count had been fluctuating like crazy recently. Hoards were unfollowing him, and hoards were following him. He’d blocked dozens of horrid anons and Tumblr was exhausting him. Still, he found that making the videos helped him spend less time on there. 

A few more articles had been written and Harry had been looking forward to finding out what One Direction’s team would say in response. Instead of a statement, Louis addressed it directly in an interview, which Harry spliced into this particular video of his.

_ “There’s this rumour going around that I died in a car accident. Yeah, they think I died and was replaced with an imposter.” _

_ “Seriously?”  _ the presenter asked.

_ “Yeah, yeah, yeah! It’s funny, really. People genuinely believe it, but it’s not true. Obviously.” _

“Not a good liar,” Harry said to the camera, shaking his head. “People  _ genuinely believe? _ Very odd phrasing. Try harder. If you’re going to pretend to be Louis for the rest of your life, mate, you need to get a lot better.”

As he uploaded the video, chewing on his thumbnail, James knocked on his door.

“Ed’s cooking dinner. Did you just finish a video?”

“I wasn’t expecting them to do a straight denial from Louis’ mouth. I thought it’d be a statement.”

James shrugged. “More powerful this way?”

“Mm. God, this whole thing is making me wanna start smoking again.”

“Harry. Don’t.” James shot him a warning look. “Come on, let’s have some dinner.”

Ed told the boys over dinner that he was recording a few songs for a demo in a couple of weeks. Harry let his mind wander from Louis, immersing himself in chatter about Ed’s flourishing career, he and James teasing Ed about all the things they were going to spend his money on. Harry washed up the dinner stuff afterwards and James dried and put away the crockery. 

Ed had gone to his room, but he wandered back out not long later and folded his arms, leaning on the kitchen door frame and looking at Harry curiously.

“What?” Harry asked, pulling off his rubber washing up gloves.

“You know my friend Jade?”

Harry snorted in amusement. “Jade from Little Mix? Yeah, Ed. Vaguely familiar.”

“Apparently, the record company thinks it’d be good for Louis to do an interview about the rumour.”

“Really? God.”

“And… they thought it’d be interesting for a fan to conduct it. One of the conspiracy theorists.”

Harry felt the colour drain from his face. “Ed-”

“And Jade suggested you!”

Harry felt faint. “How does she even know about me?!”

Ed shrugged. “I talk about you all the time.”

-

Harry was conflicted. He’d love a chance to confront this guy - he was certain by now that the rumour was true - but he didn’t want to be made a fool of by Louis’ team. 

“It’s pretty easy not to let them take the piss.”

“I’m not sure that’s true, Ed.” Harry sighed.

“Keep your cool. Be mindful of saying anything that might make you sound like a lunatic. Do not let them wind you up -  _ very _ important - and just stay clinical and calm.”

“James? What do you think?”

“Mate, you’ll get so many followers if you do it.”

“James!”

“Look, do it. I agree with Ed, I think you can avoid the worst of them making you look bad. If nothing else, it’ll be a funny story to tell. Get a rise out of him, but don’t let him get a rise out of you.”

“So you want me to go and antagonise him?”

“That’s not what we’re saying,” Ed jumped in.

“That’s exactly what I’m saying,” James replied.

-

It was a difficult and nerve-wracking decision to make, but Harry made it. He woke up with a burning passion for the truth and he decided that he absolutely couldn’t pass up the opportunity to confront this guy. When the phone call came, he got as much information as possible before he agreed. He was surprised to hear that it was simply for Harry’s benefit, for him to interview Louis for his blog. This made Harry fairly suspicious - what would ‘Louis’ get out of it?

_ “A chance to speak about the rumours and lay them to rest, once and for all,”  _ Louis’ manager, Kelly, had said.

Yeah… that wouldn’t be happening on Harry’s watch. Still, Kelly made it clear they’d have final sign off on Harry’s write-up before he posted the interview and all in all, Harry liked that he’d be able to control how he came across. 

“Okay,” he agreed. “I’ll do it.”

-

“Should we… sit down?” Kelly suggested.

Harry sat down and continued to stare. He looked like Louis, no doubt about it, which of course made him gorgeous. Harry wondered if this guy was a natural doppelganger or if they’d given him cosmetic surgery. He  _ had _ to have had surgery, surely.

“So…” Louis started, gesturing to Harry, signalling that he could start the interview.

Harry’s palms were sweating. He looked from Louis to Kelly, and back to Louis. They both stared at him expectantly and he clutched his notebook tightly.

“Um… hi.”

Louis’ mouth twitched and Harry could see the smirk in his eyes. Harry got a surge of irritation and it spurred him on, gave him the rush he needed. He sat up straighter, clearing his throat and setting his phone to record, placing it on the table between himself and Louis.

“No family with you today, Louis?”

Louis’ eyebrow twitched. “No. They don’t usually follow me around everywhere.”

“Hm.” Harry nodded, pouting slightly. He opened his notebook, peering into it seriously. “So, this  _ rumour _ started off the back of a car crash a couple of months ago. Any truth to that?”

“Minor, very minor. A cat walked out in the road and the guy in front of me hit the brakes. I went into the back of him. Gave me a right fright, but nothing worse than that. We exchanged info and went on our way.”

Harry raised his eyebrows. “Seems like quite the escalation from that to a death rumour.”

“Well, you know.” Louis beamed charmingly. “That’s what the media in this country do. They’re disgusting.”

“Scratch that out,” Kelly said quietly, leaning in towards Harry’s phone.

A thrill zipped through Harry. He had this, he was doing well. He’d got an answer out of Louis that the fandom would appreciate even if Harry himself didn’t believe it to be true. 

“So, Louis. What do the other boys think about the rumours of you being dead?”

Louis glanced over to Kelly before making eye contact with Harry. Harry tried hard not to get distracted, tried not to get lost in the blue, blue eyes of Louis Tomlinson’s imposter.

“Niall thinks it’s hilarious, actually. The other two just kind of think it’s annoying, and I’m inclined to agree.”

Louis stared at Harry, and Harry stared at Louis. Harry refused to break eye contact, particularly when Louis was staring him in the face and basically calling him annoying.

“You know what’s annoying?” Harry mused, still staring into Louis’ eyes. “When your favourite celebrity has a personality transplant, and you much prefer the first one.”

Louis’ expression hardened slightly. “I’m very sorry if my maturing offends you so much.”

“Do you wanna know what really  _ offends _ me,  _ Louis?” _ Harry heard his voice getting louder and mentally scolded himself but the volume wasn’t coming down. “My intelligence being insulted.”

“Now, now, boys.” Kelly sighed. “Stick with the interview.”

Harry rolled his eyes petulantly. “Fine, okay. So, Louis. What can you tell me about the song  _ Two Ghosts?” _

Louis’ brow furrowed. “It’s a very personal song to me. I’d rather not delve into the meaning behind it all, if that’s what you’re angling.”

“Hm. Okay.” Harry smirked and wrote  _ no answer _ in his notebook, mainly for situational emphasis since he was recording the whole thing. Louis looked at him curiously. “Should I bother with asking about any of your other songs?”

“So, what? Is  _ Two Ghosts _ supposed to be some kind of clue?”

“It’s a song about being a shadow of your former self. Which… is all you are, really. A shadow of Louis. Nowhere near as big and bright as he was.”

Louis sighed loudly. “Is that so?”

“You know what I also never understood?” Harry said, becoming more determined. “Why you always seemed to be singled out in photoshoots. How come in the album photoshoot, everybody was wearing colours and you wore all black?  _ The colour of mourning?” _

“They tell me what to wear for that stuff!”

“Hm, yeah. And what about the fact that if you play Olivia backwards, you can hear Liam mumble  _ ‘Louis gone’  _ several times?”

“You definitely made that up. Or you’re hearing things. Have you ever heard of confirmation bias, Harry? It means you’re likely to interpret situations to support your beliefs. Either that or you’re just a troll.”

“You’re the troll.”

“You’re out of your mind!” Louis cried, standing up and throwing his arms up in exasperation. “I’m a human being standing in front of you. How can you think that I died and a whole other person took my place? That’s crazy.”

“Are you calling me crazy?” Harry said, maybe a little louder than necessary. He leapt to his feet and squared up to Louis, searching his face for physical clues. “Your nose is a different shape.”

“It’s fucking not.”

“Your plastic surgeon did a great job, but not perfect.”

Louis looked at Kelly. “Whose big idea was this, anyway? This guy’s lost the plot.”

“How dare you?” Harry scoffed. “If you were really Louis, you’d be glad that I cared this much.”

“You’ve been going around telling the entire internet I’m dead! What is there to be glad about, exactly?”

“God, you’re unpleasant.” Harry narrowed his eyes and shook his head. “I’m going to expose you,  _ imposter.” _

Louis’ hardened expression eased and he fixed it to a soft smile. “Good luck with that one, love.”

“Don’t call me  _ love.” _

“Sorry... it’s Harry, yeah?” Louis smirked, sitting back down. “So, how exactly will you  _ expose _ me, Harry?”

Harry glared at Louis, returning to his seat. His heart was pounding. Arguing with this lad was giving Harry a strange thrill. It felt great to finally confront someone about the whole thing, if he was honest. He levelled Louis with a knowing smirk and threw him a shrug.

“Not sure yet.” He sniffed. “We’ll see, won’t we?”

Louis laughed, a light, airy sound as he glanced at Kelly. “Cool, cool. Right, well. Any other questions, Harry?”

Harry reopened his notebook and stared at the page, unseeing. He had lots of things he had yet to ask, more lyric questions and fandom references. Louis was watching him, blinking slowly and licking his lips. Harry slammed his notebook shut, making Louis jump slightly.

“You know what, I’m not sure there’s any point.”

Harry stood to his feet, striding towards the door. Kelly came after him, stopping him just as he got into the hallway.

“Harry, come back.”

“What’s the point? It’s all a big joke to him. For fuck’s sake. This isn’t funny for me. I know you guys probably just wanna take the piss but I’m not here for that.”

“Of course he’s going to be testy, look what you’re accusing him of.”

“That’s the whole point of this interview.”

The door swung open and Louis looked from Harry to Kelly.

“I told you this was a bad idea,” he told her.

“Look, if we all just go back inside, and-”

“Let the boy go, Kelly.” Louis smiled coyly at Harry and handed him his phone. “This is pointless.”

Louis closed the door and Harry let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. Kelly sighed laboriously.

“Okay, well. Email me the audio file and we’ll see if we can scrape something together.”

“Fine, whatever,” Harry mumbled, turning on his heel and leaving.

-

“Harry? Come on, open the door.” Ed sighed loudly through the door. “I didn’t even know you had a lock on your door.”

Harry turned over in bed, shoving his face into his pillow and he groaned quietly. “Just leave me alone, for God’s sake. I’ll come out when I’m ready.”

He heard Ed retreat and he sighed with relief. His phone was full of missed calls from Ed, and James, and Kelly. The only people he’d spoken to were his mother and work. 

Harry would leave his room tomorrow to go to work - he couldn’t justify a second sick day to himself - but for today, he would continue to sulk. He’d wait until the house was silent before he headed out into the kitchen for some food, not that he had much of an appetite. Until then, he was watching crappy film after crappy film on Netflix in a bid to distract himself from his encounter with Louis.

It didn’t work.

A few hours later, the flat had fallen quiet and dark. Harry snuck out of his room, tiptoeing to the kitchen. When he flicked on the light, he practically screamed as he saw James sitting at the kitchen table.

“What the  _ fuck _ are you doing? You freak!”

“This is the only way I could think to see you, check you’re okay.” James looked at him, scrutinising. “Aside from climbing up the house and peering in your window.”

“Curtains are closed, anyway,” Harry mumbled miserably as he filled up the kettle. No point hurrying now he’d been caught. “I’m fine, James. Just wallowing.”

“Don’t let him do this to you, man. What happened?”

“Nothing. He’s a dick. That’s it. Hardly breaking news, is it? He’s covering up a death, of course he’s a dick.”

“You’re in charge of publishing the interview though, right? They can’t do anything to you?”

“I really don’t think there’s anything to salvage.”

James fell silent. Harry made them both a cup of tea and joined James at the table.

“It was the weirdest thing to come face to face with him.” Harry sighed. “I got him pretty angry, but he got me angry, too. I thought it might get physical at one point.”

James’ widened his eyes. “But it didn’t?”

“Oh, no. Of course not. Anyway, the whole thing was a stupid idea. I mean, were we ever really gonna have a civil conversation?”

James snorted. “1DHQ getting it wrong, as usual.”

“Their manager is nice. She tried to get us to talk but it wasn’t working.” Harry looked at James. “I’ll play you the recording tomorrow. I got arsey very quickly.”

James cracked a smile. “Aw. I’d expect nothing less of you, Haz.”

-

Kelly got back to Harry with a hackjob interview transcript which just served as a denial for Louis, half of which wasn’t even nearly said in their meeting. Harry refused to post it, editing it and sending it back for approval. Kelly edited it again, sending it back with a small financial offer. Harry swallowed his pride (and his integrity) and agreed. 

-

Everything started to get back to normal after that. Harry pulled back from Tumblr a bit, feeling a bit unenthused now that he’d posted that interview transcript. It didn’t make him look bad but it wasn’t the entire truth. He wanted to forget the whole thing had even happened and tried to fill his spare time with other activities. He started running more, and he was baking all the time. He was very pleased, he pondered as he sat down with a cupcake, to have found two activities to occupy him that basically cancel each other out.

“James? Can you bring some milk home from work tomorrow?”

“Go out and get some, lazy.” James threw a cushion at a pouting Harry. “Hey, when was the last time you saw Ed?”

“Umm… not sure. Why?”

“I’ve not seen him in a few days. I’m just wondering when to file the missing persons report.”

“I heard him clattering about yesterday morning.” Harry paused to yawn. “He’s in the studio now and I think they’ve got him doing really long hours.”

“Well, it’s his turn to clean the bathroom.”

Harry pouted. “Kinda quiet without him, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” James replied. “Do you think he’s gonna leave us?”

Harry looked at James, tilting his head and giving him a sympathetic smile. James was cuddling the cushion for comfort and Harry felt a surge of affection for his friend.

“Aw, James. He’s got a long way to go before he’ll be buying his four-storey mansion. I think you’ll be going first.”

James chewed his bottom lip. “Yeah. I suppose. It’s scary. I think she’s starting to expect me to propose. I’m not ready.”

“So talk to her about it, James. Communication is healthy in a relationship.”

Harry’s phone vibrated against his thigh and he rolled his eyes when he saw he had an email from Kelly. She enquired to whether Harry had any notable feedback about the interview. He would’ve really like to reply with a reminder that he was not her employee and was under no obligation to continue any kind of correspondence with her, but in fact it had been part of the deal.

“I really appreciate you buying this TV with your One Direction money, Harry.” James nodded towards the 50 inch 4K television. “Very nice of you.”

“Mm, well, I feel like I sold my soul for it.”

“It’s not as if you’ve started acting like you believe the narrative. I think you came out as the winner in all of this.”

Harry pouted miserably as he replied to Kelly and told her that the interview had convinced almost none of his followers that Louis wasn’t in fact dead. 

_ “Also,” _ he added at the bottom,  _ “can you kindly inform me when my obligations to you are finished, as I’d really rather forget this whole sorry incident ever happened.” _

-

“I hate my job.”

Ed and James looked up as Harry came in, sighing heavily as he unceremoniously pulled his McDonald’s shirt over his head. He threw it down onto the coffee table, narrowly missing Ed’s cup of tea.

“Did something happen?” Ed asked tentatively.

“No.”

“Oh.”

Harry plopped onto the sofa, rubbing his hand up and down his bare torso distractedly. James was watching him with what looked like morbid interest and Harry frowned at him. 

“Gonna wank over this later?” Harry asked, irritated. “Me, touching myself?”

“”Please,” James scoffed. “Some of us are in relationships.”

Harry’s frown deepened and he pouted. True, he was single and it was sad. Both his flatmates were in relationships and Harry wondered if he’d have found a boyfriend if he hadn’t spent all his time on Tumblr trying to disprove the existence of Louis Tomlinson.

“Well, if you’re interested, the recording studio I’ve been at this week are looking for a receptionist.”

Harry looked over to Ed, sitting up straight. “Seriously?”

“Yeah, man. If you wanna print out a CV, I’ll drop it in tomorrow morning.”

Harry got up and trotted over to Ed, throwing his arms around his neck and kissing his cheek. “Thank you, thank you!”

“It’s cool, mate.”

-

Harry’s first day at the studio was nerve-racking. He had the feeling people were laughing at him for wearing a tie, and he made a mental note to dress down a bit tomorrow. Still, he absolutely loved getting his foot in the door in the music industry, even if Ed was only recording here for a couple more days and he’d be all alone.

The next day, he wore a shirt but kept it open collar. He got exactly four paper cuts from all the printing and paperwork he was required to do, and some singer who he’d never heard of was unbelievably rude to him. 

“It’ll get better,” Ed told him, the two of them leaving together on Ed’s last day recording there. “There’s surely still less dickheads that you have to serve in McDonald’s?”

“Suppose.” Harry sighed. “It’s nice to not smell of grease at the end of my shift. It’s also nice to have my evenings free again.”

“James has a big date with Julia tonight,” Ed said. “You wanna get a takeaway?”

“Sure. Things are getting kinda serious with them two, no?” Harry nudged Ed. “Don’t think he’ll be with us much longer.”

“Well, I’m doing well for myself,” Ed said. “Might be able to buy my own place soon. You’ll be on your own, trying to find a tiny flat you can afford all on your own.”

“God, you’re horrible.”

Ed smirked as they got on the bus, swiping their Oyster cards. “I’m joking, mate. I won’t be moving for a long while, and even then I can’t stand the thought of living alone. If I move, you’re always welcome to come with.”

“Thanks, Ed!” Harry ruffled his hair obnoxiously.

-

Two weeks into the new job and Harry had started to feel fairly settled. He’d made acquaintances, a few people to sit with at lunch, and he was starting to get in a routine with his work. He still hated filing, but he liked interacting with people and he even got to meet a few singers he recognised. 

It was all fun and games until one Monday morning. Harry yawned as he booted his computer up, logging into his email to print out today’s visitor list. He took a sip of coffee as he glanced at it, suddenly inhaling with surprise and choking and spluttering on his coffee.

“What the fuck?” He stared down at the paper, disbelieving. The name  _ Louis Tomlinson _ stuck out like a sore thumb, burning into Harry’s eyes where it sat among the names of his bandmates. A feeling of dread washed over him. The thought that he was going to have to come face to face with that man again was not one he felt he could handle very well. Once upon a time, this would’ve been a dream come true for Harry, seeing One Direction for days and days at his place of work. Now? He couldn’t think of anything worse than the trauma of it, day in, day out.

Liam and Zayn turned up first and Harry started to perspire as they checked themselves in, mumbling a polite enough greeting to him. They were both so good looking in the flesh, up close and personal. Harry’s palms started to sweat and he discreetly rubbed his palms on his jeans.

Niall turned up next, too lively for 8am and telling Harry he liked his pink pen. Harry tried to remain professional in the face of his favourite band, but Niall being so friendly was almost too much. The final nail in the coffin was when the other one turned up.

Looking every bit the popstar, Louis sauntered in with a coffee in hand and sunglasses on his face. He smiled to Harry politely before his grin melted off his face and he stopped in his tracks, pulling his sunglasses off and raised his eyebrows in surprise.

“Is that you? Harry, right?” Louis scoffed, smirking. “Well, well, well.”

“It’s creepy you remember my name,” Harry muttered, hating that his face was flushing red. “Yes, it’s me. Make sure you sign in.”

“You working here?” Louis asked as he placed his sunglasses on the desk, checking himself in.

“No, I’m just standing behind the desk for a touch of banter.”

“Alright, sassy!” Louis smirked again, and Harry felt infuriated. How would he do this for a number of days? Harry sorely hoped the band weren’t recording here for long. “Gotta go. Chat later.”

Harry scowled at Louis’ back as he headed away. He didn’t want to  _ chat later.  _ Harry sat down in his chair, sighing and wondering if he could quit, or take holiday, or something. Anything.

-

Harry got the impression that Ed might’ve known that One Direction were going to be recording at the studio. James, however, was just as horrified as Harry had been, although he made a comment about swinging by, hoping to meet the others. Harry had begged him not to do anything that might make him look bad. As much as he was uncomfortable with the situation, he didn’t really want to get fired.

“So,” Louis said as he checked himself into the building the next morning. “Still think I’m dead?”

Harry rolled his eyes. “Good morning, Mr Tomlinson. Have a good day.”

“Hm.” Louis smirked, sipping at his coffee. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

Harry pouted, staring pointedly at his computer screen and tapping away at the keyboard. Louis laughed and Harry sighed, looking up at him.

“Look,  _ Louis.”  _ Harry scoffed. “Some of us need to remain professional. So, if you don’t mind, I think it’d be better for everybody if you and I didn’t engage in small talk.”

The smirk faded from Louis’ face. He stared at Harry for a few seconds before shrugging.

“Alright. See you later.”

Harry’s heart jolted and for a split second he felt guilty, worried he’d hurt Louis’ feelings. He quickly came to his senses. This wasn’t Louis. It was… whatever his name was. He was an imposter. He deserved it.

A little later on, Harry was coming back from his lunch break when he saw Niall walk back in through the front doors.

“Harry! Got ya a coffee, mate.”

“Thanks,” Harry responded, surprised. “That’s so nice. How do you even know my name?”

“It’s on your security pass around your neck, genius.” Niall grinned, turning around as Louis walked in through the front. 

“What you up to, Niall?” Louis asked, glancing at Harry out the corner of his eye. 

“I brought Harry here a coffee, since he’s always so friendly and sleepy in the mornings.”

“Ha!” Louis scoffed. “Yeah. Do you know who this is?”

Harry glared at Louis as Niall shook his head, looking between Louis and Harry, confused.

“He’s Harry. What? Do you two know each other?”

“Remember when I had to meet that fan who thought I was dead? Replaced by an imposter? Harry.”

Niall widened his eyes comically, turning his head slowly to look at Harry, who was staring daggers at Louis. Niall burst out laughing.

“No fuckin’ way! Classic. Oh God. Wait ‘til the other boys hear this!” He looked at Harry and his laughter died away, smiling. “I promise you, mate. Louis went nowhere. This fucker’s still the same old fucker.”

“He won’t believe you.” Louis shrugged. “Come on, let’s get back in.”

Harry spent the rest of the day feeling embarrassed, humiliated. Niall laughing at him made him feel like shit. Niall obviously was on Louis’ side, was always going to keep the secret. Harry had thought for a second that Niall was a nice guy but then again, all four of them were keeping one of the biggest secrets ever. Were they being forced or were they complicit?

“See you tomorrow!” Niall called over to Harry as the boys left. Louis ignored him, chatting to Liam, and Zayn just looked at him curiously. 

-

“So?” James raised his eyebrows as he stuffed a sandwich into his mouth. “What are you thinking?”

“He’s just so…” Harry frowned, sighing as he rested his chin on his palm. “Almost cocky. Like he’s looking at me and thinking, ‘you’ll never catch me.’”

“Ugh.” James rolled his eyes. “He’s a creep.”

“And then he totally embarrassed me in front of Niall. He’s vile.”

James frowned, resuming his eating. Harry scrolled Tumblr for a few minutes, not really bothered, if he was honest. He’d started to lose interest since his screaming about Louis being dead had died down. He still discussed it a bit but it just made him feel too sad. 

If only his followers knew he’d come face to face with the band. Face to face with…  _ him.  _ Again.

_ “Please _ can I come and meet them?” James whined. “Just one of them? Any of them?”

“What about Louis?” Harry cocked an eyebrow before shrugging. “Look, just… come pick me up for lunch one day. And maybe you’ll bump into one of them.”

“Thank you! Yay!” James clapped his hands together excitedly. “I’m gonna come for lunch tomorrow!”

“Okay, but look. If you bump into Louis, don’t confront him. He knows about me but I don’t want him putting in a complaint that I’m getting people to gang up on him, or something.”

“Of course! Of course.”

-

James turned up and when Louis walked past, he scowled openly. Harry sighed, rolling his eyes.

“Can you behave?” Harry asked, exasperated. “You said you would.”

“Sorry, just… It’s so infuriating to see him in the flesh.”

“Tell me about it!” Harry replied. “Okay, can we go to lunch now? You’ve seen one of them.”

“But I- oh my gosh, here comes Zayn.”

Zayn walked past slowly, looking between Harry and James suspiciously. James was acting exaggeratedly nonchalant and Zayn frowned as he left the building.

“Well done, James,” Harry said, rolling his eyes. “Now he thinks you’re a creep.”

“Sorry. I can’t help it.” James sighed. “Okay, let’s go to lunch.”

James took Harry to the posh little cafe at the end of the road that he’d passed a few times and always wanted an excuse to try. They were seated in the far corner, ordering their drinks before Harry glanced around and let out a groan.

“Shit,” he muttered.

“What?”

“Louis is here.” Harry huffed. “Over there against the opposite wall. Why is the universe against me? Why do bad things happen to good people?”

“Chill out, Haz.” James glanced over to Louis. “Don’t make a scene, he’ll have no idea you’re here.”

“But  _ I  _ know  _ he’s  _ here.” Harry looked over and watched Louis talk on the phone as he absently twirled spaghetti around his fork. He’d very much like to slap him. “His mere presence disturbs me.”

Their drinks came and they ordered food, but Harry felt on edge. He and Louis had barely spoken but the bad blood between them was thick and heavy in the air. Harry knew Louis’ secret. Harry was loud about it. No wonder Louis had it in for him. Their food arrived and Harry picked up his fork, twirling it thoughtfully between his fingers.

Harry wondered if Louis could get him fired just on his word. Maybe Harry should be nicer to Louis.

“This salad is fantastic,” James murmured through the leaves in his mouth. “We should come here, like, once a week.”

“More like once a month.” Harry stuck his fork into his steak with a little aggression. “Who can afford this every week?”

James just shrugged, shovelling more food into his mouth. Harry started to cut his steak into cubes, stopping dead as he felt someone approach the table. He knew it was him. He just knew.

“Well. Hello, Harry!”

“Hi, um… Louis, is it?” Harry looked up at him sweetly. “Fancy seeing you here.”

“Did you… follow me here?” Louis narrowed his eyes, grinning.

Harry sighed, popping a cube of steak into his mouth. “You wish.”

“Hm,” Louis hummed, amused. He turned to James and offered his hand. “Hiya, I’m Louis.”

James glanced to Harry who was shaking his head in disdain. James looked back to Louis and scoffed.

“If you say so,” James replied and Harry snorted in amusement.

“Ohh. I see.” Louis shrugged, smirking. “You’re one of those.”

James rolled his eyes sassily, shaking his head as he stuck his fork into a cube of feta from his salad.

“Thanks for coming to say hi.” Harry stared relentlessly at Louis. “I suppose I’ll see you around a bit later.”

Louis retreated and James widened his eyes, jaw dropping slightly.

“What’s with him?” James shook his head. “What’s his problem?”

“He’s got it in for me, James. He’s just trying to wind me up. Dickhead.”

-

Harry remembered when he’d first met Louis and Louis had quickly become short and snappy, unamused by the whole thing. There was no longer any trace of that, Louis smirking every time he saw Harry as if their situation was the funniest thing in the world. It infuriated Harry to the ends of the earth. He actually tried to be nice to Louis, trying his best to be professional and civil and putting aside the fact that this moron was a huge fraudster. 

A week into One Direction’s stint at the studio, Harry was out in the smoking area - he’d started up again as of yesterday - and was surprised to be joined by a taken aback Louis.

“Oh.” Louis leaned against the opposite wall.

The smoking area was a small patio area behind the studios, secluded by smaller buildings as not to be seen from the street or car park. Harry had to admit it was quite lovely. There was a tree in the corner and a bench against one wall, the whole little square surrounded by stone decoration. It was rather swanky, but Harry supposed if they were having the likes of One Direction here, they couldn’t exactly provide them with a shitty smoking area.

Harry was expecting some kind of teasing from Louis, but the air was awkward as Louis silently lit up, shifting his weight from foot to foot. Eventually he cleared his throat, and Harry looked up.

“I didn’t know you smoked. I’ve never seen you out here.”

Harry shrugged. “I don’t really. Just…”

Harry wanted to just stub his cigarette out and head back inside, but there was no way he wanted to give Louis the satisfaction of driving him away from anywhere. He also wished that he’d sat down, but now Louis was standing next to the bench and Harry didn’t want to get any closer.

“You been working here long, then?” Louis asked.

“No,” Harry replied shortly. “Few weeks.”

“Oh.” Louis nodded thoughtfully. “Coincidental timing.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?” Harry snapped.

“Nothing!” Louis replied, eyes wide. “Just what I said, that’s all.”

Harry sighed. Louis always had to be so… abrasive. Making digs wherever he could. Harry couldn’t even enjoy a bloody fag break, a time to relax and unwind without someone irritating him.

“So,” Louis continued. “You’re not here, like... plotting my murder, or anything?”

Harry had had enough. He marched over to Louis, standing two feet away from him and looking in his eyes sternly. They’d done a good job. This bloke’s eyes were almost as blue as the original Louis’.

“No, Louis. You know why? Because, one: not everything revolves around you! And two: death is a serious thing to me, you know, it’s not just an everyday reality of my job that I have to conceal.”

Louis smiled slightly. “Oh. Like me, you mean?”

“I’m really glad the whole thing amuses you. Must be really satisfying, stealing a dead man’s career and fortune.” Harry raised his eyebrows. “I’ll never stop trying to get Louis justice. I hope you know that.”

Louis absently flicked ash from the end of his cigarette. “Well, as a person who  _ is _ Louis…” He paused to smirk. “I actually find it very touching that you’re so passionate about what you believe in, you know, sticking up for me and stuff. It’s admirable.”

Harry scoffed. “Yeah, whatever.”

Taking one last drag, he stubbed his cigarette out in the bin next to Louis, blowing smoke out of his lungs with no effort to turn away. Louis spluttered as it blew into his face and Harry went inside, satisfaction bubbling with the anxiety in his gut.

-

Niall brought Harry a coffee again a few mornings later and Harry felt uneasy. Niall was by far the friendliest out of all the boys and Harry really, really wanted to like him. Niall was disarming him, and Harry hated it. At the end of the day, Harry tried to remember Niall was complicit in the whole conspiracy, too.

Liam seemed wary of Harry, and Zayn straight up threw him dirty looks every time he walked through. Louis seemed a little more coy than before, although he still acted up occasionally when other people were around. Niall was curious.

“Do you really think Louis is a fake?” Niall asked.

Harry sighed. “Niall, don’t start.”

“I’m interested!” Niall tapped Harry on the arm. “He went through some shit during our break, you know.”

Harry felt a pang of guilt before coming to his senses and rolling his eyes. “Yeah. Like dying.”

“Do you really run a blog about it?” Niall asked curiously.

“Yeah.” Harry sighed, staring at the floor. “Well, my heart isn’t it in anymore. It’s all too sad.”

Niall frowned. “Oh.”

“Don’t worry, I’ve not told anyone you guys are here, or anything.”

“Oh, I wasn’t-”

“Niall!” Louis stuck his head out into reception, glancing at Harry before raising his eyebrows at Niall. “Come on, mate.”

-

Ed was off doing a gig in Manchester and James was staying with Julia. Harry sort of wandered around the house like a lost puppy, not used to being on his own. He didn’t like it. Eventually he decided he should watch a film, microwaving some popcorn and jumping onto the counter. Maybe he should check his Tumblr.

**_Anonymous asked:_ ** _ Have you been MIA cos you changed your opinion? _

**_Anonymous asked:_ ** _ Harry where are you? :( _

**_Anonymous asked:_ ** _ Louis is so fake lmao _

**_Anonymous asked:_ ** _ Niall loves you _

The asks went on, and on, and on. The Niall one creeped Harry out somewhat, wondering if Niall had found his blog, but he was used to getting weird asks so he mostly forgot all about it.

He decided to answer the first one, just to make his position clear.

**_ha-ha-harry answered:_ ** _ Hiiiii everyone. No I haven’t changed my mind on Louis. I haven’t been on much because it just makes me feel so down, I dunno, I kinda think that we’ll probably never expose this shit and so I can’t engage with it anymore? Louis is dead and this random bloke has stolen his name, image, career. I can hardly bear to watch anymore so I find it really difficult to come on, to be honest. _

_ #also I’ve met him through work a few times #he’s so smug #it makes me really sad _

Harry sighed, throwing his phone on the counter as the popcorn smell filled the kitchen, the popping taking place of silence and he hopped off the counter to approach the fridge. He didn’t feel like beer. He wanted some sugar, so he made himself a Malibu and Coke. He grabbed the steaming bag from the microwave, holding it with his fingertips at the corner. He picked up his drink and headed into the living room.

James had a blanket that was draped messily on the sofa and Harry threw himself down on it. Harry’s phone vibrated in his pocket and he saw a Tumblr message from one of his mutuals.

**_Rainbouis sent you a message:_ ** _ HARRRRRRRRY! Omg so good to see you. I keep asking James about you. I miss you xxx _

**_Ha-ha-harry:_ ** _ I MISS YOU TOO RAIN! How’s things around here? X _

**_Rainbouis:_ ** _ It’s so tense babe, no one knows what to think. You’re not around to lead us LOL. So you met him more times? What did you think??? _

**_Ha-ha-harry:_ ** _ It’s upsetting because he looks so much like him but he’s just off, you know? He remembered me so he knows I know. I see him every day Rain _

**_Rainbouis:_ ** _ every day omg! Poor you :( _

Harry sighed, throwing his phone down. He didn’t want to think of Louis tonight. He wanted to forget. Forget about the fact he was alone. Forget about Louis’ covered-up death. Forget about the fact he couldn’t escape it even when he went to work. He prayed for the day One Direction finished recording at the studio, but for now, he wanted to get tipsy and veg out in front of the TV.

-

Work was even more boring the next day because Harry was working a late shift. One Direction were behind schedule and so they recorded into the night, Harry having to sit on reception with even less to do than usual.

“Harry, we’re gonna order the boys some pizza,” Kelly told him. “Just to let you know to expect it. We’re gonna order loads, we’d love it if you’d join us.”

“Oh… I-”

“You can lock the door and join us for twenty minutes, surely? As long as you don’t kill Louis.”

_ He’s already dead,  _ Harry stopped himself from saying. He relented and when the pizza came some forty minutes later, Harry locked the door and helped Kelly carry the pizzas, sides, and drinks through to the lounge area. He felt the atmosphere shift the moment he walked into the room, feeling self conscious as every eye turned to look at him. Zayn in particular was staring openly, almost shooting daggers as Harry placed the hot boxes in the middle of the room.

Harry was mostly forgotten as everybody tucked in. He held back, shuffling around the room to find Niall. He thought sitting next to Niall was his best bet, not really fancying an awkward situation or being glared at by Zayn.

“Dig in, Harry.” Niall cocked his head to gesture Harry over. 

Harry tentatively joined Niall, picking up a piece of garlic bread and biting into it. He grabbed a slice of pizza and sat with his back against a sofa. He observed as the dozen or so people in the room started to settle, chatting amongst themselves as they ate.

“I wasn’t hungry until I smelt the pizza.” Harry grinned to Niall.

“I’m fucking starving!” Niall’s mouth was full and he looked happy as can be. “This pizza is so good.”

“Want some Pepsi?” someone asked from Harry’s right, and of course it was Louis.

“Thanks.” Harry took the plastic cup, watching as Louis poured Pepsi into it. Harry handed it to Niall and watched as Louis poured another. “You’re a waiter, now?”

“No,” Louis replied. “I’m just a very generous person.”

Louis winked at Harry before moving onto the next person. Harry nearly choked, surprised. Louis  _ winked. _ Harry was very annoyed at the stab of dull arousal he’d felt. Fuck.

“Dickhead,” he mumbled under his breath.

They ended up all sitting around for 45 minutes, and Harry thought they all seemed like they could do with the break. It was nearly 10pm, and Harry had been given a tentative locking-up time of around 2am. He wondered if things had been going wrong in the studio. Maybe fake Louis’ voice wasn’t up to par.

Zayn was talking about the yummy food they’d eaten over the years. Niall was agreeing emphatically with everything he said.

“Oh, remember that time in Germany?” Louis piped up. “That guy I’d been seeing made us order-”

“Louis!” Zayn interrupted, darting his eyes over to Harry, then back at Louis. “We have company.”

Louis looked at Harry and raised his eyebrows. “No offence to Harry, but I don’t think many people would believe anything he has to say.”

Harry felt a blush creep up his face. It was a rude thing for Louis to say, but Harry knew it was true. He shrugged.

“He’s got a point.” Harry shrugged at Zayn. 

Conversation resumed and a few minutes later, Harry found Louis sitting next to him.

“I hope I didn’t upset you?” he asked Harry.

Harry shrugged. “True though, isn’t it? Who would believe the crazy conspiracy theorist, anyway?”

Louis smiled somewhat sheepishly. “Good thing, though. It’s really not the time for me to get outed.”

“I’d never out you. I’d never out anyone.” Harry said abruptly. “No matter how much I dislike you.”

Louis little grin faded for a moment before returning, albeit with a little less light than before. He shrugged, nudging Harry.

“Fancy a cigarette?”

The temptation was too great so they headed outside, Harry flicking the lights on. The soft lighting was pleasant. Harry had never seen it before, had never really been around after dark.

“We’ll be out of your hair in a week or so. Two, tops.” Louis sniffed as he lit his cigarette. You guys have been so accommodating to us.”

Harry followed Louis to the bench, snatching the pack of cigarettes from his hand and stealing one. He held it between his teeth, holding it towards Louis in request for him to light it. Louis obliged.

“I’m not a bad person, Harry. I mean, aside from what you think is me impersonating a dead person. It’d be a shame if you wrote me off, you know?”

What was he on about? Harry rolled his eyes discreetly. Why did he even want to be around someone who didn’t like him? Harry only followed him out here because he’d run out of cigarettes and knew he’d be able to nick one from Louis. Harry looked sideways at him and the soft yellow light from above made his eyelashes cast shadows high on his cheeks. He looked gorgeous, and Harry resented nothing quite as much as he resented that.

He hated the person inside, but he adored the outside. As Louis blew smoke from his lungs with his lips pursed, Harry found himself wanting to kiss them, and then found himself wishing that things were different. Imagine if the real Louis didn’t die. Harry could’ve been sitting here with him instead. Harry might’ve even made a move on him.

“You live with Ed Sheeran, right?”

Harry snapped his head round to look at Louis. “Yeah. Why, you know him? Since when?!”

“Oh, I’ve just met him a couple of times, one of our producers worked with him. We said we’d meet up soon, have a jam session. Maybe write a couple of tracks.”

Harry was going to kill Ed. Befriending the enemy, and then keeping it a secret. What a snake. 

“I see,” he responded. “He’s a good lad.”

“He really is.” Louis flicked ash into the cigarette bin. “You know what, Harry? For some reason, it’s been really good to see you again.”

_ Do not let your guard down, _ Harry was internally screaming to himself.  _ He’s up to something. _

“I really need to get back to reception.” Harry quickly stubbed his cigarette out. “Turn the light off when you’re done?”

He made a hasty retreat back to his desk, where he held his face in his hands and wondered why he’d just opted to spend time with such a heinous individual.

-

“I knew you’d react like this.”

“You can’t be friends with him, Ed!” Harry was trying not to sound like a maniac, but his voice was getting all high and whiny. He couldn’t help it. He felt panicked. “He’s an awful human being!”

Ed’s nostrils flared slightly, but he stayed quiet and continued to make his sandwich. Harry just scoffed, running his fingers through his curls, wincing as a strand of hair caught in his ring. Ed walked off towards the living room and Harry hurried after him.

“Ed? I’m serious.”

“Harry.” Ed stopped abruptly in the doorway of the living room, turning and looking at Harry. He looked a bit like he was losing his patience and Harry felt a sort of satisfaction at getting a rise out of him. “Look, I get that you think Louis is this terrible person, but can you just stop for a second and remember that I personally do not think the real Louis died and was replaced. That’s literally your only basis for saying Louis is awful. So I’m really sorry if you feel uncomfortable about us being friends, but-”

“Okay, okay! You’re right.” Harry sighed. It was really easy for him to lose perspective, sometimes. He was always going to be weird about Ed being friends with Louis, but there was nothing he could do. Ed had absolutely no reason to think Louis was a dick. Not everyone could agree with Harry and James, he supposed. “I’m sorry. I’ll stop, but can I just ask you one favour?”

Ed sighed, shrugging. “What?”

“Please never bring him here. I couldn’t bear him being in my home.”

“That’s fine,” Ed said. “I won’t. Promise.”

Harry smiled. As hard as it would be, Harry had to just let Ed realise for himself that Louis was a horrible person.

-

“Morning, Harry.”

“Morning, Louis.” Harry glanced up as Louis signed himself in, briefly making eye contact before he headed into the studio. 

Harry watched him walk off. He didn’t really have much choice but to become accustomed to Louis being around. He didn’t really feel tense around him anymore, which made his working day a lot easier but at the same time, he hated it. It felt like he was folding on his principles, folding on the whole scam. Maybe that was the plan all along. Maybe Louis was instructed to befriend Harry, disarm him. Shut him up.

Harry was deep in thought as Zayn and Liam walked in, Zayn signing them both in with a stony silence. Liam mumbled a quiet  _ hi _ and they both disappeared down the corridor. Niall had arrived first, bringing Harry not only a coffee but also a croissant. Maybe it was Niall sent to disarm Harry. Or maybe he fancied him.

As Harry half-heartedly mused in his head whether or not he’d sleep with Niall, his phone buzzed with a text from James.

**_James:_ ** _ Can we go for lunch today?? At that place?? _

Harry typed back a quick yes as he decided he absolutely would not sleep with Niall, given the opportunity. He moved onto Liam, mulling it over but really, he knew none of the boys had ever interested him in the way Louis had. Even now, as Louis walked past him to head out the front to take a phone call, he couldn’t help but be attracted to him, fake or not. Harry licked his lips as Louis headed out the door, hips swaying and Harry couldn’t work out if it was on purpose.

Harry huffed quietly, dropping his cheek to his palm, elbow propped on the desk. He was thoroughly confused. Louis came back in, looking at Harry immediately and the two maintained eye contact right up until Louis was level with Harry’s desk.

“You alright? You need anything?”

“No,” Harry scoffed.

-

Harry was tired and for some reason, he was feeling a little bit miserable. James eyed him curiously as he took a bite of his ciabatta, Harry sighing as he pulled a bit of ham from his panini and popped it into his mouth.

“Work okay?”

Harry shrugged. “Fine, yeah.”

James frowned, chewing before swallowing and tilting his head. “Something’s on your mind. Is it Louis?”

Harry swallowed. He wasn’t thinking about Louis. He wasn’t thinking about anything. It’s just that a weird energy was thrumming inside of him, making him feel anxious and on edge. Maybe a storm was coming, or something. Either way, it was annoying as fuck. Harry just wanted to go home, wrap himself in his duvet and eat an entire tub of Ben and Jerry’s.

“You’re not… starting to think…”

“No, James!” Harry replied, rolling his eyes. “Nothing could ever make me believe that he’s the real Louis. Okay?”

Harry started to shake his knee under the table. He forced himself to take a couple of bites of his panini but his appetite wasn’t really up for it. A cigarette would go down much better, but it’d be rude to walk out in the middle of lunch. He choked down his panini, using his entire glass of water to wash it down as his mouth was unusually dry.

When he arrived back to work, Harry felt awful that he’d been the worst company for James. He decided that when he stopped off to Tesco later to get his ice cream - because he was definitely getting ice cream - he’d buy James a custard slice, his favourite. Harry headed straight out the back to the smoking area, audibly sighing with relief as he exhaled his first lungful of smoke, sitting down on the bench.

“Tough morning?”

Harry got the fright of his life as Louis appeared next to him. He didn’t know how he hadn’t seen Louis out there. Harry’s heart was pounding erratically and he felt like he was dying. This anxiety was irritating the hell out of him.

“Could say that.” Harry watched as Louis sat down on the bench next to him. “I don’t feel very good.”

“Aw, I’m sorry.” Louis turned his head to blow smoke away. “Anything I can do?”

“No, Louis.” Harry sighed, irritated. What was with Louis? Why was he trying to help all the time? It was creepy. “I just feel weird. Tense.”

“Why don’t you come out later with me and the boys? We’re gonna just go for a quiet drink afterwards, might help you to relax.”

“No, I’m gonna go home and eat my body weight in ice cream.”

“I just think-”

“Louis!” Harry cried, exasperated. “What is  _ with  _ you? I don’t like you. You know I don’t. You have no reason to like me, so can you just… stop being nice to me?”

Louis just blinked, wide eyed. Harry watched the column of his neck as he swallowed, watched his shoulders sag as he exhaled.

“I just… I kind of wondered if being around me might change your mind. You might realise… Well, anyway…”

Bizarrely, a memory popped into Harry’s head of James, Ed and himself excitedly listening to the album when it was released. He also thought of the times when something would happen with the band and Tumblr was alive and buzzing. These were some of Harry’s very favourite memories in the One Direction fandom, freaking out with his fellow fans, and suddenly he was grieving for the experiences he’d no longer have. This whole death conspiracy had ruined the entire band for him for good. He couldn’t support the machine and the individuals who were concealing and profiting off of Louis’ death like this. 

He’d never forgive Louis - this second-rate, fake Louis - and the others for ruining this part of his life and not only that, for ruining the memory of Louis.

“I don’t know what you’re up to, but it’s never going to work. Okay? Leave me alone.”

Louis frowned deeply and Harry stared at him defiantly, all the while wondering about the real man behind the new Louis. What was his real name? There was some talk on Tumblr about him being a man named Adam Pepper, a look-a-like who had worked as a stuntman on a One Direction video shoot before they went on their break. Harry was never completely sold on it but he’d always kept it in the back of his mind.

Louis was still sitting next to Harry, staring mournfully as his cigarette burned down, ash dropping to the floor. Harry felt a flash of rage in his gut and he stood up, stubbing his own cigarette out and stormed over to the door.

“You won’t get away with this,  _ Adam.” _

Harry slammed the door shut behind him, anxiety bubbling up worse than before but petty satisfaction saving him from a total meltdown.

-

Harry couldn’t face functioning like an adult the next day. He pulled a sickie, sulking on the sofa all day with his duvet and making his way through two tubes of Pringles.

“Ugh.” Ed winced as he walked into the living room in the afternoon. “It stinks in here.”

“Of what?” Harry asked, tipping the crumbs from the bottom of the Pringles can into his mouth, missing somewhat and tipping crumbs over his face.

“Boy. You.” Ed scoffed as he opened a window. “Hey, you wanna go out tomorrow night?”

Harry groaned. “Not sure if I’ll be up for it.”

“Oh, come on!” Ed said, smiling sweetly. He was up to something. “I said I’d go out and I don’t wanna go on my own.”

Harry cocked an eyebrow. “Where?”

“It’s a private party at a club in town!” Ed smiled hopefully. “It’s Johnny’s birthday.”

“Who the hell is Johnny?”

“Um… you know. 1D’s sound engineer.”

“Ed, are you serious?” Harry sighed loudly and exaggeratedly. “You want me to go out and party with my mortal enemy?”

“Come on. It’s not that serious. Plus, you can avoid him easily in that place. There will be loads of people there.”

“I just… I don’t think…”

“Free drinks?” Ed offered hopefully.

“Free drinks?” Harry repeated, pouting in thought. “I’ll think about it.”

-

He must’ve been crazy to even consider it. But maybe Ed was right. Harry could be in the same club as Louis without running into him. As Harry sat at work that next day, he wondered if Louis had told Ed to invite him. When he’d come in that morning he’d been as sweet as usual to Harry, despite Harry telling him to leave him alone. In fact, Louis was being especially sweet, him being the one instead of Niall to bring Harry breakfast. Harry refused to eat it, leaving it on top of the desk for half an hour before relenting and scoffing the croissant, downing the lukewarm coffee. He was far too hungry to uphold his principles for any longer.

He’d got himself out of the habit of using the smoking area, not being able to face the idea of being there with Louis again and opting to walk out into the street instead. He made a quick phone call to his mum, pacing back and forth outside the studio. He turned to continue his stroll, jumping when he saw Louis behind him.

He quickly said his goodbyes to his mother.

“Are you following me?” Harry exclaimed. “God!”

“You’re avoiding me.”

“Of course I’m bloody avoiding you. I told you to leave me alone.”

“Don’t do this, babe.” Louis frowned. “I hear you’re coming to Johnny’s birthday.”

Anger bubbled in Harry’s gut at hearing the endearment. “And?”

“I’m glad, that’s all. Hey, the other day you called me Adam. Who’s Adam?”

“You’re too clever to play dumb, Louis. Adam. Whatever.”

Harry started to stride back to work, Louis trailing after him. As they approached the doors, Louis was accosted by a fan and Harry turned around, walking backwards into the lobby with a smug grin.

-

Harry knocked another shot back and looked around the club. Ed should’ve known better than to invite him along, really. Still, he was here now. Ed was off networking somewhere - yes, in the middle of a club - and Harry was left to his own devices, which mostly involved propping up the bar and getting pissed.

“Well, if it isn’t young Mr Styles!”

Harry rolled his eyes, darting his head around to look over his shoulder. Louis was standing there smirking and Harry scoffed, shaking his head. He was a bit too drunk to deal with Louis right now. From the slight glazed-over look in Louis’ eyes, he was at least tipsy himself.

“What do you want, fake?” Harry said impatiently.

Louis rolled his eyes but walked around to the other side of Harry so they were face to face, and he tilted his head. “Want a drink, darling?”

“No,” Harry scoffed, glaring at Louis out of the corner of his eye. Harry slid his empty shot glass between his hands, pouting. “Well, you can get me another shot. Tequila.”

“Now, babe. You’re a bit tipsy as it is. How about a beer, or cider?” Louis smiled indulgently. “An orange juice? Or just a water?”

“Look,  _ Adam.  _ Fuck off. Don’t offer to buy me a fucking drink and then police what I want.”

“Well, someone’s sassy today.”

Harry shot him another glare. “I’m not at work now, mate. I don’t need to be polite to your fake arse.”

Louis let out a light, airy laugh. “Alright, darling.”

He ordered Harry a strawberry and kiwi cider, telling him it would suit him because it was  _ sweet _ and  _ pink _ and  _ really fruity. _ Harry scowled. If he was honest, the cider was delicious and his mouth watered at the thought, but Louis didn’t need to know that.

“Don’t you dare think I owe you anything just because you bought me a drink,” Harry told Louis. “In fact, you should be grateful I’m even letting you stand next to me, Adam.”

Louis’ smirk faded to a sad smile. “Harry, when will you stop calling me Adam? That’s not my name. You know it’s not. I don’t know why you hate me so much.”

Harry frowned at him, standing up straight and moving close to Louis. He was maybe two inches taller than him and he tried to make the most of it, leering over him darkly.

“I think you’re scum,” Harry said as quietly as the noise in the club would allow. “I cared about Louis a lot. I loved him. I am fucking devastated about what happened to him, and I always will be.”

Louis just stared at Harry’s throat, looking troubled. For a moment, Harry almost felt like Louis might confess, finally tell the truth. Almost.

“I really wish you’d see that it’s me.” Louis looked up into Harry’s eyes. “I wish…”

Rage clouded Harry’s mind. “However much they’re paying you, it should never be enough to help cover up someone’s death.”

Louis parted his lips as if to respond but he closed them again, shaking his head and he turned to stride away from Harry. Harry couldn’t believe the cheek of it. In fact, he couldn’t stand the fact Louis had come up to him and been so brazen with his lies. Harry took one mouthful of his cider before jogging after Louis.

“And another thing,” Harry called out as he hit the street just after Louis. Louis turned around quickly, startled. “Why do you fucking care so much? I’ve been telling people for however long that you’re dead - that Louis is dead. No one ever believes me. Why does it matter to you so much what I fucking think? Whether you’re Louis or you’re Adam, it shouldn’t matter.”

“Look, I just fucking like you, okay? When you’re not being a dick to me, I like being around you. And I just wish you’d stop being so pig-headed and see how wrong you are.”

Harry’s heart hurt and his head swam. It just seemed… so real, sometimes. Adam looked so much like Louis, and Harry couldn’t think straight and he wasn’t sure he could even blame the alcohol. A year ago, Harry would’ve done anything to stand this close to Louis, to hear Louis say he  _ just fucking likes him. _ Before he knew what he was doing, he’d leaned him and grabbed Louis’ face, pressing a firm kiss to his lips.  _ He’s a fake,  _ he was internally yelling to himself.  _ He’s a fraud.  _ But all of Harry’s pent up frustrations towards this man were coming out, pressing him against the wall of the side of the club. Louis eventually pushed him away, harshly shoving at his chest.

“What the fuck?” Louis asked in a hushed tone. 

“Fuck. Sorry, I-”

“You can’t just do that in public. We have to go somewhere.”

Before Harry could process what Louis had said, he was being dragged by the wrist back into the club. Louis pulled him straight towards the VIP toilets. The whole club was closed for the private party but the VIP toilets were tucked out of the way, and it was unlikely anybody would bother finding them. Louis pushed Harry into a cubicle, locking the door before kissing him eagerly.

It was a blur. Harry didn’t think - he didn’t dare let himself think - and before he knew it, Louis was dropping to his knees and unbuttoning Harry’s jeans. As Louis tugged them down along with his boxers, Harry’s heart started to pound and his brain finally caught up.

“Louis-”

Louis paused, mouth agape, ready to take Harry in. Fuck. His mouth looked so inviting, so warm, so wet. Louis, or  _ whoever _ he was, was so gorgeous. Perfectly sculpted cheekbones and eyes that Harry would be perfectly content to drown in.  _ Fuck it, _ Harry thought. Just fuck it.

“Nothing. Carry on.”

-

A clatter from the kitchen woke Harry up with a start. He groaned softly, looking around his room. It was a fucking mess. He was tangled in his duvet and as he sleepily tried to unravel it from his body, he grimaced at the horrible taste in his mouth. 

“Fuck,” he muttered to himself. “Why’d I get so drunk?”

The memory hit him suddenly, and before he could finish processing the thought he started to groan loudly. There was a soft knock on the door, and James walked in without waiting for an answer.

“Hungover?”

“Oh my  _ God,” _ Harry whined. “James, I did the stupidest thing last night.”

“Yeah,” James agreed, frowning as he sat on the edge of the bed. “You stink. How much did you drink?”

“Fuck. Not that.” Harry pulled the duvet over his head but James whipped it off immediately. “I let Louis… Adam… whatever his name is…”

“Ew, you let him  _ what?” _

Harry covered his face with his hands. “I let him suck me off in the toilets.”

“Harry!” James leapt up in outrage. “How could you do that? What the hell is wrong with you?”

“I don’t know! I was… muddled. And to be fair, you know, he looks a lot like Louis. You know how attracted I was to Louis.”

James was visibly fuming, his face red and his lips pressed together to form a thin, angry line. “I cannot believe you.”

“It was a moment of weakness.” Harry looked at him with pleading eyes. “I’m sorry! A hot guy wanted to give me a blow job, I was drunk, I just...”

James paced the room, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. He kept glancing at Harry, who was starting to feel really shitty about the whole thing. James was right. What was he thinking? Harry despised this man. He was a symbol of the disgusting cover up of Louis’ death and usually, Harry couldn’t stand to be around him. And he’d let him suck him off. Oh, God…

“Please tell me you’re not starting to believe that man’s sick lies.”

“Of course I’m not!” Harry replied, starting to sound panicked. “It’s not like that!”

“Okay, okay…” James sat back down on the bed, rubbing his temples. “What happened after that?”

“I, um…” Harry frowned in thought. “We kissed for a bit, and then he just… left.”

“Did he look really smug? Bet he did.”

“Actually, no.” Harry frowned in concentration, trying to remember. “He looked a bit… sad.”

James snorted in dark amusement. “Maybe the bastard had a split second of conscience.”

-

Come Monday, Harry was sitting in reception, staring at his Outlook inbox. He’d caught up on the necessary weekend emails and now he couldn’t concentrate on doing much else. He heard someone walk through the door and his heart leapt into his mouth when he saw Louis approach the desk.

“Hi.”

“Hello.” Harry sniffed, staring intently at his computer screen.

“Can we talk?”

“I’m working, Louis.” Harry glanced up at him. “Adam.”

Louis flinched, before recovering and leaning over Harry’s desk. He watched as Harry typed absolute gibberish into an email.

“I’m really sorry. About Saturday night.” Louis sighed. “I should never have…”

Harry rolled his eyes. “Oh, come off it. You’re not in the least bit sorry. You knew exactly what you were doing.”

Louis sighed loudly. “May I remind you that I left the club and  _ you _ came after  _ me?” _ He shook his head. “I’d also like to point out that you called me Louis the whole time that we were… you know.”

Harry felt his ears turning red. Still, he scoffed and glared up at Louis. He really wished he was able to just walk away.

“Haven’t you got some impostering to do?” Harry raised his eyebrows in question. “Unless you have something else to say-”

“Look, I just came to say I was sorry. It was stupid and unprofessional of me to do anything with you. Selfish, even.”

“Okay.”

Louis stood up straight, pushing his hands into his pockets. “I do like you, you know. I wasn’t lying.”

Harry looked up at that and Louis just shrugged, turning to walk away.

-

Harry hadn’t told Ed but by the way he kept glancing at him, Harry guessed that James had. Or Louis. 

“If you have something to say…” Harry snapped, glaring at Ed when he felt him staring for the upteenth time. “Spit it out.”

“I’m just wondering what’s going on.”

“Nothing is going on,” Harry said through gritted teeth. “Nothing has changed.”

“Except Louis digesting your bodily fluids.”

Harry groaned in disgust. Leave it to Ed to be so crude. Although Harry didn’t have a very clear memory of that night, he remembered vividly the feeling of coming into Louis’ mouth, fingers gripped tightly onto the hair behind his ears. The anger and bitterness that had built up inside of Harry had given the whole experience a delicious edge to it that Harry’s body ached to feel again. Harry couldn’t let that happen.

“It was a one-off, Ed. I still hate him and everything he stands for.”

Ed hummed, unconvinced. Harry rolled his eyes and buried himself in a game he was playing on his iPhone. Anything to keep his mind off of the internal war he was feeling. Moral versus desire. Attraction versus hatred. Harry versus Louis.

-

Finally, Harry received the news he’d been waiting for: One Direction were leaving at the end of the week. He looked forward to it, to never seeing Louis again and getting on with his life, chalking the whole thing down to experience. He’d get over it, he reckoned, once he wasn’t seeing  _ the fake _ every day. 

As guilty as he felt, he had to let the real Louis go. Fake Louis would just be an anecdote Harry told at parties -  _ I had a brief sexual encounter with a celebrity, once -  _ and nothing more. 

He hated that he felt a little sad about it, and when Louis walked past his desk, he felt a pang of disappointment.

“Hey.” Louis waved.

“Hey.”

Louis stopped in his tracks, likely due to the fact that he hadn’t got a semi-polite reply from Harry in a while. He approached, leaning his forearms on the desk and looking down on Harry.

“You okay?”

“Yeah. Why?” Harry replied, staring at his computer screen.

Louis sighed quietly. “Come for a fag? You can get someone to cover for you for ten minutes, surely?”

Harry sighed, feeling too conflicted to argue. And he really could do with a cigarette. He nodded, ringing upstairs for someone to cover him briefly. 

“So,” Louis began. “Our last week here.”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll miss this place,” Louis said, and Harry could feel him staring at him. Thankfully, a girl from upstairs came to cover him and Harry leapt out of his chair.

“I won’t be long,” he told her, turning to follow Louis out to the smoking area.

His eyes habitually fell to Louis’ bum, and Harry rolled his eyes at himself.  _ Behave.  _ When they got outside, Louis sat on the bench and Harry sat beside him. Louis slid a little closer, closing the few-inch gap Harry had left.

“I don’t want to part on sour terms, Harry.”

Shit. Harry forgot his lighter. He placed his cigarette in his mouth, turning to Louis and leaning in wordlessly. Louis lit Harry’s cigarette before lighting his own. Harry inhaled, taking a much-needed drag and sighing the smoke out a couple of seconds later.

“Just… forget about me, Louis.” Harry sighed, shaking his head. “Look. I’m done with the whole thing, okay? I don’t use Tumblr anymore. I’m not a part of the fandom these days. You’ve got away with it, okay? Just… don’t make this any harder for me. Please.”

Harry couldn’t lie, Louis looked crushed. Did Adam - or whatever his name was - really have feelings for him? It would probably be difficult for him, keeping up this incredibly painful lie in front of the man he was falling for. Harry felt sorry for him, in a detached sort of way.

“If that’s what you want.”

“You know where I stand. That hasn’t and will never change. Okay?” Harry took a particularly deep drag of his cigarette. “I just want to put the whole thing behind me.”

Louis nodded in what Harry suspected was resigned acceptance. He turned his body towards Harry, nudging him and smiling softly.

“The other night was fun though, no?”

A smile played on Harry’s mouth. “I mean… okay, yeah. It was.”

“I suppose we should just leave it there, then.” 

Louis had slid closer without Harry realising, and their thighs were now pressed together. As Harry pulled his cigarette away from his mouth, Louis darted in close and pressed a kiss to his cheek. Before Harry could truly comprehend what was happening, Louis had stubbed his cigarette out and disappeared back inside through the door.

-

Louis was dead, and his imposter had sucked Harry’s dick. Those were two things that couldn’t be taken back. Harry laid on top of his bed, fully clothed, staring at the littering of One Direction merchandise on his shelf. He should probably consider taking it all down, packing it in a box and storing it somewhere. It was over. 

“Harry?”

James poked his head around the door, frowning at the sight of Harry staring into space, fully clothed. Harry sat up properly, raising his eyebrows.

“You not at work, James?”

“Don’t feel too well.” 

Harry pouted in sympathy. “Want a cuddle?”

James nodded and so Harry shuffled over a bit, making room for James to lay next to him. 

“I miss this,” James said quietly. “I feel like we haven’t properly hung out in weeks.”

Harry took a deep breath and sighed. “I suppose we always used to hang out doing 1D things.”

“Yeah,” James replied sadly. “You wanna do something on Saturday?”

“Sure. You wanna see if Ed’s free? Or just us?”

“Maybe just us in the daytime and then with Ed in the evening?”

Harry smiled to himself. He knew he had to leave for work in a few minutes but for now, he revelled in the feeling of his best friend being in his arms. James’ heat was seeping through Harry’s clothes and into his skin - he was warmer than usual, he must have a fever - and he realised everything would be okay because he still had his friends.

“Can’t wait.” Harry pulled him closer. “Love you, James.”

-

It was Thursday, and One Direction would be walking out of Harry’s life in a day and a half. Harry tried to distract himself by texting a bunch of his friends to see who would text back.

“Harry!”

Harry looked up from his phone, thoroughly startled to see Louis in the staff room. He was panting, clutching an iPad and staring at Harry with wide eyes.

“What’s wrong with you?”

“I have proof.” Louis crossed the room and sat on the sofa next to Harry, who shuffled a couple of inches away uncomfortably. “I have proof that I’m not dead.”

Harry sighed, rolling his eyes and dropping his phone to his lap. “Right. Go on, then.”

Louis cleared his throat. “You heard about the Sony leaks?”

“Yes.”

“Okay. Well, first of all, you should know that I’m livid. Me and the boys all are.” Louis looked at Harry expectantly and when he didn’t respond, he held the iPad out to him. “An email was leaked saying that someone from the label planted the story.”

“What?”

Harry took the iPad and his heart was hammering in his chest. He glanced at the screen, trying to see straight.

“It was all a promo tactic and no one told us because they knew we’d be up in arms about it.” Louis growled. “It’s so fucking shitty. I’m really angry. But look. The article that was uploaded and then quickly deleted was planted by him. The Tumblr anons were him. He kicked it all off, Harry. This proves to you that it’s all fake, that I am who I say I am.”

Harry stared at the email on the screen. The anger he’d mostly let go was bubbling up inside of him anew. He dropped the iPad to Louis’ lap and stood to his feet. He’d  _ almost _ been convinced for a second.

“Nice try,” Harry scoffed, folding his arms. “Do you think I’m bloody stupid? You think that I’d seriously believe this?”

“Harry…”

“We’re talking about the cover-up of a death here. And you want me to believe some bloody email? Don’t be ridiculous.”

“But… it’s in the news, if you go online to-”

“Like that’s really gonna convince me! Are you stupid? Come on!” Harry was shouting, rage exploding from him. “I don’t know why you keep doing this to me. This is really upsetting for me, you know.”

“I just want you to fucking believe me!” Louis cried, frustrated. “What the hell is it going to take?”

“Look, I don’t know what your problem is. I don’t know if the label want you to convince me or sent you to befriend me, or something. But stay away from me, okay? I mean it. When you walk out that door tomorrow, I never want to see you again.”

Louis’ body sagged. He sighed, grabbing his iPad and standing up. 

“Okay.” He walked over to the door, stopping and turning. “For what it’s worth, I’m really sorry for everything. I know this whole thing has caused you a lot of pain and anguish, and despite what you think, I do care. So, I’m sorry.”

“Get out,” Harry said, the tremble in his voice betraying how close he was to tears. 

-

Harry pleaded sickness and went home after that. The whole thing had just dragged every single emotion back up, and as soon as he got through the door he burst into tears and hadn’t stopped crying since.

He was sat in his bedroom with the door locked, watching old videos of Louis on YouTube. His Louis. The  _ real _ Louis. He was eighteen and fresh-faced, giggling with Zayn in an interview as Liam answered a question. Louis was whispering in Zayn’s ear and Harry felt an old, familiar pang of jealousy that actually comforted him for some reason.

When One Direction came on the scene, Louis was eighteen and Harry was sixteen. Harry hadn’t really fully understood why he was interested in One Direction, and Harry found himself fixated on Louis. Louis was cool and fun. Louis had great style and was a ball of sunshine. He could never understand why he’d been jealous of Zayn, just kind of assuming it was to do with wanting to be friends with Louis. When Harry realised his fixation was attraction and that it turned out he liked boys, everything seemed to slide into place finally. In a way, Harry felt like he owed Louis his life as he knew it, and that was why he felt so adamant to get justice for him. He deserved to be remembered. Really remembered.

Harry started crying fresh tears, switching to a video he’d made himself:  _ The REAL Louis Tomlinson - We miss you. _ It was a montage of clips that Harry had spliced together in commemoration of Louis, some of his favourite moments. 

As Louis came on Harry’s laptop screen, teasing and mocking Liam about something, Harry felt an encompassing sadness. Liam pouted at Louis and Louis looked at him with a soft fondness, his nose twitching and his tongue licking over his bottom lip. His eyes were dancing and something clicked inside of Harry, hit him like an enormous punch in the gut.

It was familiar to him, really familiar. So fucking familiar that Harry was suddenly struggling to breathe. His mind was swimming. He’d seen that nose twitch a week ago, those dancing eyes as Louis had wound Harry up about a paper jam in his printer. Harry had got so angry he had to leave his desk and walk away. There was no way these tiny little mannerisms could be replicated, in fact even Harry hadn’t even noticed them before now. Harry’s gut twisted painfully. He felt like his world was crashing down around him as the truth dawned on him like a heavy blanket, threatening to suffocate. 

He laid back on his bed, clenching his eyes shut and focusing on regulating his breathing. He tangled his fingers in his hair, grasping and pulling to anchor himself to reality somewhat. When he was confident in the fact he wasn’t going to die, Harry sat up, wiping his eyes and trying to work out what to do next. He heard a crash out in the kitchen and he leapt to his feet, pulling his bedroom door open and dashing through the house.

“Woah!” Ed yelped as Harry slid into the kitchen. “You okay, mate? You look like shit.”

“Ed!” Harry yelled, feeling a little out of control. “I’ve made a terrible mistake!”

Ed looked Harry up and down. Harry knew how bad he looked. He’s pulled his jeans off when he’d got home so he was currently dressed in a pair of old, tatty boxers and his grey t-shirt was stained with tears. He was trembling slightly, his face red and blotchy, eyes swollen and still leaking tears. He didn’t even want to think about the state of his hair.

“What have you done?” Ed asked, looking like he wasn’t even sure if he wanted to know. 

“I need your help,” Harry said, nodding to himself. “We need an Uber.”

“Okay. Where are we going, H?”

-

Ed had been to exactly one writing session at Louis’, so he eventually agreed to take Harry there. Whether he’d be home was another matter, but Harry wasn’t exactly thinking straight and Ed was just sort of indulging him, bless him.

Harry felt Ed glancing at him over and over in the cab. Harry’s knee was shaking, chewing on his thumbnail as they sped through West London. As the cab slowed to a stop on a very posh looking street, Harry whimpered, tense. Ed paid the driver and they got out, walking past a few large houses before arriving at the one Harry recognised from pap pictures. 

Louis’ house was set back from the street and Harry and Ed were standing by a black gate. Trees obscured the house itself and Harry whimpered again, feeling like he was about to start crying afresh.

“Right,” Ed muttered, clearing his throat before pressing the buzzer on the intercom.

_ “Yes?” _ A gruff voice crackled through.

“Um, hi. My name is Ed Sheeran. I’m here to see Louis.”

The intercom crackled for a moment before the voice spoke again.  _ “He isn’t expecting anybody.” _

“Please…” Ed sighed. “Can you just tell Louis I’m here? Ed Sheeran. It’s urgent.”

The intercom fell silent and Harry sighed, tears spilling out of his eyes again in sheer anxiety. The gate buzzed, clicking and Ed immediately pushed it open and stood aside to let Harry through. 

“Fuck,” Harry mumbled, drawing in a ragged breath as he followed Ed up the drive. Louis’ house came into view; a big, square building shining white in the moonlight. Ed wasn’t messing about. He marched up to the front door and rang the bell. Harry had to jog to catch up, and he leaned his back against the doorframe, staring up at the moon and staying out of view of the door.

The door opened and Harry’s heart jumped into his mouth. He started to cry silently.

“Hello, mate.”

“Hi, Louis,” Ed responded.

“My security said it was urgent? Is everything, um… is… Harry okay? Has something happened? Or-”

Ed sighed, tapping Harry’s arm and looking at him pointedly. Harry turned around and stepped into view of Louis, looking down at his feet and trying to stifle his heavy sobs. 

“Oh…” Louis said in surprise.

“So, I’ll be off… if that’s okay?” Ed asked. 

Louis looked at Harry who was staring at Louis’ chest, avoiding his eyes avidly. Louis gave Ed a small nod, and Ed departed with a reassuring hand on Harry’s back.

“Are you okay?” Louis asked softly. Harry just inhaled, his breath catching. “Come in.”

Louis stepped aside and as soon as Harry entered the house he burst into loud, hysterical tears, covering his face with his hands. Louis quickly shut the door, shuffling in front of Harry a bit, unsure what to do.

“I’m- I’m so… sorry,” Harry sobbed.

“It’s okay,” Louis soothed. “Let it out.”

“No…” Harry whined, dropping his hands and looking at Louis for the first time. “I’ve been so horrible to you. How do you not hate me?  _ How?” _

Harry put his hands over his face again. He felt Louis wrap an arm around his waist and lead him somewhere. Harry went easily, no energy to think let alone comprehend what was happening.

“Sit down, love.” They were in some kind of lounge area and Harry plopped down on the leather sofa. Louis sat next to him, keeping a few inches between their bodies. “Tell me what’s going on.”

“I  _ know.”  _ Harry sobbed. “I know you’re not a fake. You’re not  _ dead!  _ Fucking hell. I’ve been vile towards you, Louis. And you’ve still been so nice.”

Louis shushed him gently, rubbing his back. Harry squeezed his eyes shut. Everything that had made sense to him for months and months was melting away, and whatever Harry had seen that he thought was hard proof gave way to what he knew for sure in his heart. This was Louis Tomlinson. How could he have been so blind? 

“I’m so, so sorry, Louis.”

“What changed your mind?” Louis asked softly, carefully.

“I saw something that had been under my nose the whole time.” Harry scoffed, rolling his eyes. “I was watching an old video of you, and you looked at Liam with this exact expression I’ve seen you look at me with. You just can’t fake that kind of shit.”

Louis just hummed. Harry swiped at his red, swollen eyes, looking at Louis with a sad smile. Louis frowned, shaking his head slowly.

“I’m not angry at you, Harry. I haven’t been angry in a long time. I’ve just felt… sad. And frustrated. All I’ve wanted was for you to realise that I’m genuine. To take me at face value.”

Harry sniffed loudly, his bottom lip wobbling. He thought he might cry again, and he turned his body away from Louis. 

“It’s weird,” Harry stated. “It’s weird because I always felt sort of drawn to you, but I was disgusted by you. Sorry. I hated it. That should’ve been a clue, really.”

“It’s okay.” Louis slid closer to Harry and put his arm around his shoulders. “You got there.”

Harry leaned into Louis’ touch, sighing and just absorbing the comfort. Harry knew Louis had a thing for him, had known for a while. Ever since he’d arrived at Louis’ place, all he could think about was…  _ why? _ How could Louis have possibly seen anything in Harry he’d liked? Harry had been full of hate and bitterness. That wasn’t usually him at all. 

“I’ll make it up to you,” Harry murmured. 

“Entirely unnecessary.” Louis squeezed him. “Hey, shall we go and make a cup of tea?”

Harry nodded. He followed Louis out into the kitchen, blearily trying to take in his surroundings. Louis’ house was more homely than it seemed from the outside. The kitchen was attached to a dining room, a huge, chunky table in the middle of the room with fresh flowers in the middle. Harry felt himself smile for the first time since he’d stepped foot in the house.

“Sit down, my love,” Louis ordered, pointing at a bar stool at the island. Harry obeyed, watching Louis empty the teapot. “Harry, please don’t beat yourself up. Especially not on my behalf. Think of it this way: Your emotional ordeal is over. I’m alive. As far as you’re concerned, we’re both better off than you thought we were 24 hours ago.”

Harry sniffed. “That’s a very positive way to look at it.”

Louis turned round, smiling softly. He ripped off a square of kitchen roll and handed it to Harry. 

“Yeah, well. There’s no reason to be anything other than positive about this.”

Harry let out a dry laugh, shaking his head. Louis was unbelievable, in many different ways. Harry blew his nose on the piece of kitchen roll. It was the most luxurious paper towel he’d ever had the pleasure of wiping his nose on.

“Alright. I’ll stop.” Harry forced a smile onto his face. “Look on the bright side.”

“Good lad.” Louis filled the kettle and switched it on. He rounded the kitchen island, approaching Harry whose heart started to thump in his chest. Louis opened his arms. “Come here.”

Harry swallowed, dropping his feet to the floor. He wrapped his arms around Louis, cuddling him. The enormity started to dawn on him. This really was  _ Louis Tomlinson _ hugging him. Harry’s crush since he was sixteen. His homosexual awakening. The subject of countless wanks and an impressive number of sex dreams. 

The cause of Harry’s life-altering anguish for the past six months.

Harry started to quietly cry once again. “Oh, God,” he whispered, sobbing. “I’m so relieved you’re alive.”

Louis let out a soft, quiet laugh. “Thank you, love. You know, it’s been so touching seeing how much you care about me and my life. And my memory.”

“I actually almost feel embarrassed,” Harry murmured. “I’ve never made it a secret to you how much I felt for you. The actual you.”

Louis stroked the hair at the back of Harry’s neck and Harry could barely breathe. He almost felt like everything he wanted had just dropped into his lap. It wasn’t that simple, of course. He had some emotional healing to do and even if Louis was alright with everything that happened, Harry wouldn’t feel okay about the way he’d treated Louis for a long time.

“I hope we can get to a good place together.” Louis was still holding him, still stroking his hair.

“Louis.” Harry sighed. “I want you to get to know me. You don’t know the real me at all.”

“Rubbish!”

“You don’t. You know the angry, bitter, hateful Harry. That’s not me.”

“Darling.” Louis sighed. “I know the passionate man who stands up for what he believes in. Who fights for justice. Who cares and protects his loved ones fiercely.”

“Mm.”

“You’re funny, and silly. You’ve got a bit of a temper, yes. But hey, it’s hot when you get all worked up and frowny.”

Harry pressed his mouth to the spot where Louis’ shoulder met his neck. He smiled against his hot skin.

“Stop. You’re making me blush,” he mumbled against Louis’ neck, a tingle of elation in his heart as he heard Louis’ breath catch ever so slightly.

“Harry? I’m sorry for what I did in the club. I really do feel like I took advantage of you. I hated myself when I woke up the next morning.”

“Hey. I wasn’t that drunk.”

Louis pulled away to look into Harry’s eyes. “That’s not what I mean. I used your anger and sadness about the situation and turned it on you. Just to satisfy my own needs. You were vulnerable.”

Harry sniffed. “I didn’t feel taken advantage of, Louis. My irritation was at myself. I think we’re both just guilty of poor judgement.”

Louis looked unconvinced. He chewed on his bottom lip, staring at Harry’s neck, seeming troubled.

“Okay,” he eventually said. “But... I’m sorry. Please accept my apology. I’ll feel better.”

“Alright, fine.”

Louis sighed quietly, releasing his bottom lip. Harry looked down at it and as he started to move in, Louis put a palm on his chest.

“Look, why don’t we go into the solarium and chat? It’s far more relaxing than my kitchen.”

“Solarium? Like a conservatory?”

Louis snorted. “Not quite. It’s my pool room, really.”

“I didn’t know you had a pool room.” Harry gave a small grin. “Also, it’s night time. No sun.”

“So, we can look at the moon.”

The solarium was… breathtaking. The walls and ceiling were glass, the sky outside a dark inky blue with the moon high and bright. The stone pool was in the middle of the room, a little rocky waterfall at one end. The whole room was dotted with shrubbery and trees and Harry could tell why Louis brought him here to relax. There was a big, squashy looking seating area on one side and Louis took Harry’s hand, leading him over. He crawled onto the sofa, laying flat and holding his arm out and looking at Harry, soft and expectant.

Harry joined him, shuffling in close and cuddling up to him. Louis draped his arm on Harry’s shoulders.

“Everything will be okay, Harry,” Louis said softly.

“This whole thing has been my life for, like, six months.” Harry sighed, spreading his palm on Louis’ ribs. “I’ve convinced so many people that you’re a fake.”

Louis laughed lightly. “I get the impression that you think I’m more bothered about this whole thing than I really am.”

“You’ve always been bothered about it, though,” Harry said, confused. “You’ve been trying to get me to believe you for months.”

“Oh, Harry,” Louis replied, amusement in his tone. “That wasn’t about the rumour, it was about you. You hating me the way you did tore me apart. Especially because for some reason, I had feelings for you that would not go away.”

“I’m so s-”

“Stop!” Louis laughed. “Look, it wasn’t even about getting you to return my feelings, or anything. I just couldn’t stand you hating me, and I’d have done anything to convince you.”

Harry turned his head into Louis’ body a bit more, his nose close to his armpit. He could smell the creamy, soapy smell of what was surely Dove body wash and a very faint odour of sweat. It was comforting to Harry, for some reason.

“And if you don’t feel… um…” Louis cleared his throat. “It just means the world to me that you don’t hate me anymore.”

Harry moved up a bit, pressing his lips to Louis’ neck softly. Louis sighed, his eyes fluttering closed as Harry kissed over his skin, moving round to gently peck at his throat which bobbed as he swallowed. As Harry kissed over his jaw, making his way to Louis’ mouth, Louis sighed again and moved his head away.

“Harry,” he said, sounding pained. “You don’t have to do this.”

“But I just wanted to-”

“Shall we just… take things a bit slow?” Louis smiled indulgently. “We’re both a bit emotional right now. I think it would be better if we held off. For tonight, at least.”

Harry tried to ignore the disappointment and feeling of rejection in his gut, instead trying to focus on the relief he felt. Louis was alive. Louis didn’t hate him.  _ Louis liked him. _

“Okay,” he said quietly with a nod.

“Thank you,” Louis whispered.

“Louis, can I ask you something?”

“Sure.” Louis untangled himself from Harry and sat up, cross-legged. Harry mirrored him, hesitating before slipping a hand onto Louis’ thigh. 

“It’s just… you really did seem like a different person when you guys came back with the new album. I just wondered...”

Louis looked away, chewing on his bottom lip as he stared at Harry’s hand on his leg. He shrugged with a sigh.

“Our time off came at the perfect moment for me, really. I’d been with this guy for like two years, right, and last year, just before we released our album, we split up. I probably should’ve seen it coming really, we’d been having problems for ages. I’d been drinking a lot during that and when we split I just… broke down, really.”

“I had no idea.” Harry frowned.

“I think who I was just slipped away slowly over the course of the relationship. I was practically a shell after the break up and I really needed the time off to get back on track, sort myself out. You know? Get back to being me.”

“I’m sorry,” Harry said quietly.

“I’m all good now. Better than ever.” Louis grinned and gave a shrug. “The new me, or whatever.  _ Adam.” _

Harry winced, grimacing. “Ugh.”

“Sorry, sorry.” Louis grinned again.

“Well, the new you sounds awesome. I like it.” Harry laid his head on Louis’ shoulder. “I like you.”

Louis stretched his legs out before him and Harry did the same, sitting next to him, the entire length of their bodies pressed together. Louis took Harry’s hand in his.

“I’ll drive you home in a bit, yeah?” Louis’ fingers squeezed Harry’s. “Then maybe tomorrow, after me and the boys finish our last recording day, I can cook for you?”

“You?” Harry laughed. “Cook?”

“Excuse me, the fans have exaggerated how bad I am in the kitchen. I cook a great cheese on toast. Joking, joking. I’ve got pretty good.”

“What about the-”

“Don’t you dare say pancakes.”

The two of them giggled quietly for a little bit, talking about nothing, flirting back and forth with potential and sexual tension crackling in the air between them. Louis drove Harry home and when they stopped outside the flat, Harry turned to Louis with his eyes glistening.

“Lou?”

Louis looked at him before sliding his fingers round Harry’s neck, leaning in to kiss him. Harry’s heart hammered in his chest. There was no denying the fierce spark between them, manifesting itself in desire now instead of anger. Louis’ tongue stroked over Harry’s bottom lip, gentle but sure, and it was so familiar yet so different from the eager, charged kiss in the club. 

“Get my number from Ed, okay?” Louis slurred, eyes half closed.

Harry nodded, feeling just as affected as he climbed out of the car, making his way to his front door. He turned for one last look, and caught Louis beaming at him, smile bright.

-

“Harry?” James said, walking into the kitchen a few weeks later. “Remember when we were on Tumblr?”

“Yes…”

“Remember how nobody knew what I looked like because I’d never post photos of myself?”

Harry narrowed his eyes. He didn’t know where James was going with this but he wasn’t sure he was going to like it.

“Yes. Why?”

“So… are you aware you were papped with Louis yesterday?”

“Shut up. Was I?”

James raised his eyebrows, sighing as he leaned against the counter. “Tumblr is  _ wild _ right now.”

“They all recognised me? Fuck!” Harry groaned and put his palm up to his forehead. “They’re gonna all think Louis’ brainwashed me.”

James just shrugged, pouring himself a cup of tea.

Harry wasn’t all that sure Louis was quite aware of how involved in the fandom Harry had been. Still, in some ways, Harry wondered if it was better for him not to know. Although he was still too embarrassed to let Louis come into the flat, Harry had eventually packed down all his One Direction stuff. It kind of creeped him out to look at it.

“What you up to today, then?” James asked.

“Louis’ picking me up later and I’m finally gonna go in his pool!” Harry said, feeling excited. It was the simple things, but he’d been itching to get in that pool. The two of them hadn’t had much time to themselves since Harry’s big revelation but Louis had tomorrow off and Harry was finally staying over. It was a big evening all round.

“I’m so happy for you, man.” James sighed. “To think that a month ago, you hated him.”

“Hate’s a strong word,” Harry replied diplomatically. “But… I know. Isn’t it crazy?”

“Well, with you one hundred percent brainwashed, who knows what’ll happen to the  _ Louis is dead _ fandom. They’ll either crumble as a community, or they’ll rise up in memory of the person you used to be.”

Harry grinned, a mingling of amusement and embarrassment. “Maybe they’ll think I died and I got replaced with an imposter.”

**Author's Note:**

> Pleeease reblog the [fic post on Tumblr](https://catfishau.tumblr.com/post/171861799976/dinosaursmate-dust-to-dust-by-dinosaursmate) if you enjoyed this!


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